Reviews for One Night Stand Gone Wrong
kaw97 chapter 1 . 2/18/2011
I liked this story overall.

Just so you know, if she got pregnant in mid-January she would be due in October.

You can go to and calculate a due date. Pregnancies last 40 weeks which is more like 9 1/2 months.
nul chapter 1 . 1/16/2009
Hey!

Okay, so I really liked the sentence where you wrote:

"The live band was currently playing an upbeat song about cheating and sleeping around."

Normally when I read/hear sentences like those, it's always a "depressing" or "mellow" song about sleeping around and cheating.

Upbeat better mental image.

I mean, seriously, there are tons of upbeat songs about depressing things.

And there are depressing songs about being joyous.

Wait, I don't know where I'm going with this. FAIL. Uhm.

The line:

"They reminded her of the blue water of the islands."

I had to read that sentence several times. It was worded beautifully. I was just being stupid and going, "oh, which island?"

I like the vague-ness of it. And still can picture it.

"Young sprout."

hehe.

Typo in the sentence:

"'Do the math, genius. We started sleeping together the end of January. I new I was pregnant within the month. January plus nine is September...'"

It was the "new" and you have to change that to "knew." :))

I like the character of Lia.

She's smart and snarky. A great combination. "And just fell madly in love."

Oh, and blunt.

(sorry, I'm reading this and reviewing this at the same time)

Lia did that on purpose, didn't she?

She doesn't like Ken in that way, she's doing it to get a reaction from Makayla so that Makayla would realize that she does love Ken.

Oh, I'll feel dumb if I'm wrong.

When I was reading the last bit, I felt as if you should take it out.

But then I realized where you were going with it.

And the last sentence ended perfectly.

"Together, a perfect way to start a new life."

The emotions were really good, and able to feel.

The character's were well developed through the conversations and the narratives.

So overall, really well written and edited piece!

kthnxbai,

Martin the Waterskier
PurpI3.14 chapter 1 . 7/12/2008
heart-warming

fab job! .
White Rose Blossom chapter 1 . 7/8/2008
That was absolutley adorable. I loved it and I loved how their relationship progressed and such. Cute :)

-Aria
emotionless-stares chapter 1 . 7/1/2008
I love it. This shows that love can help you conquer anything eh? I hope to read more of your stories!
x3life chapter 1 . 6/28/2008
aw this was so cute and perfect! )
Lily Llynn chapter 1 . 6/28/2008
Very sweet. A little too perfect/happy ending, but I like how she didn't love him (or at least admit to it) easily. It's pretty awesome writing, and a pretty awesome oneshot. (: I think I'll ad it to my c2. (:
Trmpetplaya1 chapter 1 . 6/17/2008
I love it! I feel like I really got to understand and know the characters, as well as a darn good ending (sometimes one-shots leave me wanting). Great job :)
AMM3485 chapter 1 . 4/11/2008
Aw. I loved this oneshot! Great job!
barelyamiable chapter 1 . 4/1/2008
Surprising would truly be the word to describe this story.

Though unexpected, this was most certainly a pleasant read.

With a beautiful and cute ending.

(:
Xiaolu chapter 1 . 3/28/2008
Wonderful and beautifully written! It's really nice to see how love can do wonders. I'm happy she fought her demons and Ken was always there for her. What a nice man! ) And Ani sounds really cute! I love babies! Anyway, nice story!
caw122182 chapter 1 . 3/23/2008
This was cute. Great job.
TheArtOfBeingMe chapter 1 . 3/23/2008
I loved this story! It was long and really well written!
Noie chapter 1 . 3/23/2008
I really enjoyed this; you did a great job and I love long one-shots!
ManicBlue chapter 1 . 3/23/2008
So beautiful! You are a wonderful writer...tears are falling from my eyes right now! Okay not really, but they should be!