Reviews for another fractured dreamer
thewanderingstudent chapter 1 . 11/18/2008
I love painfully truthful. The image and idea it creates is beautiful...something everyone can and will relate to. The first stanza is so real it hurt to read it. But a good hurt, you know, like finally seeing the world without rose-colored-glasses...

fatbird33 chapter 1 . 7/9/2008
o this is some great stuff. i liked the line, "i'm just a ghost behind the computer screen":)
painted eyes chapter 1 . 6/30/2008
I really like this, it's so true. I like the emphasis of the word 'reality' by putting it in its own line. I thought the 'sideways smile' idea was imaginative as its not really the first thing i think of when typing.

persephone in waiting chapter 1 . 6/25/2008
I can relate to this. Not only is it painstakingly honest, but it's beautiful.
glimpses from an ivory tower chapter 1 . 4/27/2008
"the garish hues of reality" and "i'm just a ghost behind the computer screen"

Whether you deign to call yourself a poet or not, the lyricism of your verses (and the lines above) prove it.

Again, fantastic work :)

cupids.battlefield chapter 1 . 4/19/2008
Beautifully written. I loved the descriptive imagery you portrayed in this peice.

"All just typos and sideways smiles" was my favourite line. The best part is, i know no one who cannot relate.

the face in the window chapter 1 . 4/5/2008
i was going to pick out some favourite lines...but oh my gosh, i ended up copying the whole poem into this review box. an amazing write.

another favourite! :)

half-sketched.staccatos chapter 1 . 4/1/2008
konban wa

Again, a quickie. May I please add that quote to my quotebook? "i refuse to call myself a poet, just another / fractured dreamer trying to use words / to soften the garish hues of / reality"?


PunK.cHEw.AsIAn chapter 1 . 4/1/2008
This was really intense; I love the thought of a writer just being 'a ghost behind the computer screen' because you don't really know the writer when you're reading their work. And the line 'fractured dreamer trying to use words/to soften the garish hues of/reality' was, in my opinion, the best part of this poem.

Thank you for posting this, and I hope you continue to write more wondrous things, dear fractured dreamer.

Thoughtful Silence chapter 1 . 4/1/2008
I loved this. There is something so real and honest about this that makes it beautiful. I also loved the hopefully melancholy tone instilled within this (like in the line 'for now')... if that makes sense. Keep up the good work!

Faith Adeline chapter 1 . 3/31/2008
very real, very good. Keep it up!

simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 3/31/2008
I really like the title. The word garish I actually had to looked up, but it's a really great choice... lol. I also like the whole image of you behind the computer screen. I also like the bit of hope in the line for now.

The only thing I didn't like was the last two lines of the first stanza. Before my eyes for... the two fors just messed up the flow for me, but honestly im not sure how to rephrase it.. lol. And the last line... I dunno I just didn't like the exaggeration. I felt like the rest of the piece was a beautiful description of reality and that one line was a bit dramatic. Unless you serious meant for a thousand days, but that's like 3 years... so yea.

Anyhow really beautiful piece.
sweets555 chapter 1 . 3/31/2008
totally know what you mean, great job!
SEMMU chapter 1 . 3/31/2008
Very good write. It seems as if you captured the image that's applicable to many fictionpress junkies (including me). Albeit writing is new for me, I don't consider myself a poet, merely someone searching for a way to "soften the garish hues of reality", in a desperate attempt not to hurt anyone. Great job. Write on!