|Reviews for Shadows of Twilight|
| MikeCalkins chapter 1 . 6/27/2009
Whoa. i was gonna write a story similar to this. now someone beat me to the story. Bullocks! oh well, i could tweak mine to make it different. this was so cool, i mean awesome action, kinda funny. cool.
| Nave Entertainment chapter 43 . 4/23/2009
OK, I read the whole thing. Ignore all of my other reviews and just heed this one, for it is my biggest, and possibly most controversial.
Ill start with the pros, I did like the background story of how the war began, and Anony is a very interesting character (id like to know what that ice dragon thing was). I have to admit, Anony made me like ice more XD
And now for the negativity of it all. First off, ill start with your repeating of words, i think i heard the word "grimaced" more then i heard the word "the" (I exaggerate for effect).
Also id like to note your constant format of sentence, that ends up getting annoying. I quote "Anony sighed quietly as Luna was silent behind him." "Ivy flinched as she was suddenly into the ground as Roise grinned happily with her foot on the back of Ivy’s head." I think i heard "as" almost as much as i heard "grimaced" just look through your story and youll know what i mean.
Also the way Tai joined the west was kinda lame. He becomes piratically there best friend as if he did not care for his previous cause what so ever.
Also the no descriptions bugs me, but if, like you say, Its just me who doesnt approve, ill just let that one slide, although i would like to say it made the story slightly more confusing, and harder to remember the characters (for me, anyways.
And in the beginning the cliche relationships that Gabriel had with Luna and Anony (Soulmate, rival, typical). I have to admit you at least made the Anony and Gabriel thing more interesting at the end, (as you can tell, Anony is my favourite character in your story).
Well thats about it, although it occurs to me that i might be being a bit harsh with my negatives, so ill try and end it on a good note. I did enjoy the story near the end, a little slow at first (OK fine THAT was my last negative), it came through in the end. I would like to know what happened at the very end with the demons, and so my curiosity is a good sign i guess. Sorry for the big review, but i hope you think about what i say and not just pass it out as "rambling"
PS: If its possible to delete my previous reviews, go ahead and do that. lol
| Nave Entertainment chapter 18 . 4/22/2009
JAMES. YOU. HAVE. TO. DESCRIBE. THE. CHARACTERS.
| Nave Entertainment chapter 11 . 3/3/2009
Ok well i read a few more chapters and i have a bit more criticizing on me xD. Ok first of all whats with the "with a sweat drop, with a tick marck" stuff? Its as if your trying to make this a manga instead of an original story, original stories should be a tad bit more realistic.
and another thing is the fight with Mikki and Gabriel. While im happy to finaly see Gabriel beaten, Mikki was merely testing Gabriel..not trying to kill him lol they might have used guards on there blades or something or else id say there brutal enemies who have personal grudges, not friendly people doing an experiment.
well thats that cya :P
| Nave Entertainment chapter 4 . 3/2/2009
i have to say, gabriel is growing on me, even though at first he was kinda cliche, i guess he becomes more human when he gets tossed out in the world and stuff if you no what i mean. I like it so far, the characters are original, and the plot and setting are interesting. Theres only one thing i dont like and its pretty small. I dont like how Xeno claims he has mastered every weapon besides Gabriels katana as it is a normal katana unless used by anyone besides Gabriel which makes it more of a Gabriels power thing not his weapon. But its only a small way of introducing Gabriels fighting technique so i wont complain on it to much. Also try to describe your charatcers a bit more, although ive only read a few chapters so far you might of already improved in that area bye now. Ok well ill stop filling space bye XD
| Stephen Naylor chapter 1 . 1/13/2009
Ok, good and bad.
Love the idea.
Love the setting.
Love the imagery.
Hate the dialogue.
It isn't BAD, but it's just INAPPROPRIATE. I don't think medieval Japanese samurais said words like "ya" and "oi" etc. etc.
And that "How. Dare. You. Blah. Blah." line could've been written differently.
"How dare you go into the Princess's room without permission!" barked the guard, accentuating each word with a sharp stamp of his foot.
I'll be coming back to this and checking on your progress. ]
If you find the time, please review my story Silver. ]
| Tathgon chapter 18 . 1/12/2009
Excellent work so far. Can't wait for more.
| The Joelster chapter 1 . 1/12/2009
I loved it. Some repitition of words but mainly just great stuff, please write more soon! I LOVE THE SETTING!
| Stuart Johnson chapter 1 . 12/29/2008
Very interesting. i love how original your story is. i have never heard anything like it.
| Sir Thames chapter 3 . 5/27/2008
Nice story mate. Reminds of some of the anime I've seen. Spot on.
| Flytch chapter 1 . 4/24/2008
I liked it, look forward to further chapters:D
| Chiscribe chapter 1 . 4/20/2008
This seems to be influenced more by Japanese Anime than actual history, so I'm guessing you're going to have a lot of leeway as far as accuracy goes. It's only the first chapter, so I'm expecting better. :)
| JRockFan chapter 1 . 4/20/2008
this is good so far, update soon!