Reviews for Never Again
Crystal-Chaos22 chapter 7 . 9/1/2008
I really like this story, it has a good plot, a good flow, and believable characters. The scenarios are written out well. I don't think you should rewrite this, but I guess I can't stop you.

~Crystal
pseudonymlost chapter 8 . 8/25/2008
Oh! Shlick!

Can't wait!

Good luck!

;D
pseudonymlost chapter 7 . 8/24/2008
I like what you've written so far; but i think what this story really needs is background detail. You need to go into how the characters got to be the way they are: How they became friends, why she was living with Jared, when he became abusive, how she got into drugs and prostitution etc. You could do some "reflection" chapters. She's in the bathroom having a breakdown due to withdrawl and she's wondering how her life lead her up to this moment as she feels like she's literaly falling apart and doesn't even have the strength to hide it from tim as she planned. So she thinks back over what has been; drifiting in and out of consciousness you could drift in and out of memories. Then you could take some time for tim's take on everything; what made him stand by her, when he fell in love with her, why he fell in love with her, how it took so long for him to realise it had gotten so bad. Take alex too, hell even go through Jared if you think it'd work. You can lace the opinions and experiences of each of them throughout the story, as you develope plot. Is Tim going to confront Jared? Will Bev stop him? Will there be something to do with her family? What is Bev's "position" in school; social, grades etc. Was she dealing? You can go on and on through different types of dilemas. Just keep writing cuz this could be a pretty awesome story; i hope this helps somewhat with inspiration.

Catch you next update ;) bye
SSG'R' Michael B Jackson chapter 7 . 8/19/2008
This seems to be a great story so far; the characters are very easy to sympathize with. And that guy Jared; all I can say is that I'd love to get my hands on a guy like that! I've got a fifteen-year-old daughter myself and I can only imagine how I'd feel if she managed to hook up with a guy like that, drugs or no. And the kind of nausea your character is going through is all too realistic; I had some health problems a couple of years back and I was having some very similar experiences, though it didn't involve drug withdrawals. At any rate, you seem to be doing a lot of things right with this story and I'll certainly be reading as long as you're writing.

Mike Jackson
iamdeleted chapter 6 . 8/19/2008
Is she getting sick from withdrawal or from Jared's beating earlier. I really like this story! I hope you update soon!
iamdeleted chapter 5 . 8/19/2008
I loved the last line, about how she wanted both. Tim is such a sweetheart!
iamdeleted chapter 4 . 8/19/2008
God that was terrible. But I don't know if it's going to be that easy for her to get away from Jared.
iamdeleted chapter 3 . 8/19/2008
Ah, I'm glad Alex and Tim followed her. I couldn't believe that she shot up during school but an addiction is an addiction. What do they all look like?
iamdeleted chapter 2 . 8/19/2008
Wow, sex in the auditorium. It's a good thing nobody interupted them-that would have been awkward. I hope her boyfriend (Jared?) doesn't find out.

One thing I had a problem with was that she showed no previous attraction to Tim, until he started kissing her. Other than that I liked it.
iamdeleted chapter 1 . 8/19/2008
Very nice start. I liked how she can still see her damage under everything. I'm very intrigued already. This hits close to home. My mom's older sister died from a herion overdose. I congradulate you for getting clean.
LoveRehab chapter 4 . 8/18/2008
I really liked this chapter. Jared's a fucking ass. She passed out. Which means I need to read the next chapter.
LoveRehab chapter 3 . 8/18/2008
Interesting. Alex and Tim seem like good friends, although Tim seems like a better friend. :]
LoveRehab chapter 1 . 8/18/2008
I really like your first chapter. I feel for your character, you describe her feelings very well. I like your dialogue too, it's very natural. This was a really excellent first chapter, which I'm sure is the beginning to a really good story. Keep writing! I'm going to keep my eye on this one!
sooner or later its over chapter 1 . 8/10/2008
i think that you've done a really excellent job, and its really nicely written.
luverly.lufy chapter 4 . 8/8/2008
I can't wait to find out what's next

update soon :)
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