|Reviews for with you|
| McKinley Cooper chapter 1 . 5/27/2008
It's bitter beautiful.
| AK the Twilight chapter 1 . 5/27/2008
This poem illustrates a wonderful idealistic world and it succeeds. I found the reference to children at the end rather cheesy, but I thought the beginning was particularly well written. You make such great references, ideas that are pure and simple, feel like things that any good person should be able to recognize. It did get a little dark when you referenced suicide, but it picked up its momentum without much trouble.
If you can keep such momentum throughout the entire poem, this would be even better. Your analogies are grand, though simple, something few can accomplish. Great job overall.