Reviews for happy birthday
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 6/15/2008
”Two men face each other,/Hurling accusations at each other,”… I don’t think you need the repetition of each other

I like this piece a lot because the contrasts are amazing. The whole idea is really unique, which I like a lot. The only thing I might say is separate the parts about you thinking and the rest of the world. Either by stanzas or maybe italics? Still a really great piece.

PS if you’re bored, check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (link in my profile)
East-0f-Eden chapter 1 . 6/14/2008
your poem was really sad. i like the emotions you portaryed.
Tytherpol chapter 1 . 6/14/2008
i can't believe you changed it

really, wow. that's so nice of you

because i was feeling bad for telling you what i didn't like and all

the two shots are just as eerie as birds and foxes but a lot more personal,

and the "his last words" is so clever

amazing poem. the more i read it, the more fascinating it is.