Reviews for Under the Pine Trees
never-written chapter 1 . 6/15/2008
There's a certain...forcefulness...in this that I find intriguing. You choice of words (useless bag of flesh, fleshbag) is powerful and improve the poem.

I especially like the line "the spaces between atoms don't have enough room."
Yasona Black chapter 1 . 6/15/2008
Wow...that was really cool. I loved how you described the body as "Fleshbag tupperware." That totally rocked. I also really liked how you built up to the ending, so that it ends up being almost like a love poem, with a whole moment in time type of thing.
Princess-anna57 chapter 1 . 6/15/2008
I really like this piece, the second stanza especially. Well done! Write on!

Anna _