|Reviews for The Morning After|
| Tulessa Kalhoty chapter 1 . 10/27/2009
:O Creepy. But somehow...COOL! :D
| Mirabella chapter 1 . 8/26/2009
Well told, i must say, and well written. :)
I like how the revelation of exactly what she was eating came about. Nicely done. :)
| improvisationallychallenged chapter 1 . 2/6/2009
This is wonderful, in the creepiest way possible... I love the slow deterioration of her humanity as she wakes up - going from the relatively normal task of trying to remember the why's, how's and who's of the situation before happily chowing down on fellow guests.
It's also a twist well done - I didn't realise quite what was happening until its too late. It also left me wondering exactly how she ended up a zombie...ethanol overdose perhaps...
| blurrylights chapter 1 . 1/29/2009
Oh dear...that was violent. But really good! I'm not normally into zombie stories, but I really enjoyed this one. The description of her eating the woman creeped me out though!
| Dellagio chapter 1 . 1/22/2009
Oh mon friggin' dieu. I loved this story, it is definitely my first favourite story on this site.
I seriously thought that Julie would have a bit of a more... mundane problem, personally. All right, rape date drugs aren't too mundane, but you get my meaning, yes?
I will read more of your stuff when I'm not at school. XD!
| Icyfire4w5 chapter 1 . 11/26/2008
Oh dear, I have assumed that Julie is a rape victim... The twist is very eerie. I like the idea that Julie "felt a small twinge of guilt". Zombies are not heartless, after all.
| Julia Lucrezia Hanazono chapter 1 . 10/18/2008
Wow! This is good! A great oneshot! Um...I hope you don't mind me asking, but would you like to see/review my stories? There's TCR (The Catalyst's Rebellion) and my most recent, The Princess of the Land of Snow (NO, this isn't a cliche fantasy story!). Sorry to ask. I'll check out your other stories later. Keep up the good work!
| She Is Here chapter 1 . 8/16/2008
hahaha- i love the twist in the end. i was expecting it to go into her remembering her party from the previous night as she endured her hangover (a typical 'gossip girl' story). it was great! it's definitely the type of twisted story i am into!
the only thing i suggest is maybe adding a little more information about the boy she had remembered encountered the previous night. maybe if while she was eating the meal as she realized what it was and then stating what it was as she remembered what had happened to the boy- what she had done to him, or what else he had done to her.
overall- great work! keep going with it!
| Selarose chapter 1 . 8/16/2008
[Weird that I'm reading this, eh?...]
Oh, wow. I kept expecting someone—or something—to jump out and...eat/grab/attack her. XD
I think "cloud like wisps" should be 'cloud-like', 'cause it kind of sounds like a simile at first. XD
I kind of lost myself here for a bit: "Long tangled, filthy once lustrous blond hair hung..." And 'painful' strikes me as really odd in this sentence: "...her hunger making her move quickly despite how painful she felt." I don't know. I've never heard/read of someone who felt painful...it's usually something that felt painful to them, but not themselves...ya know?
I loved this line: "...the only thoughts really occupying Julie's mind were how bitterly cold she was and how empty she felt from starvation." And the ending. I don't really know why, but I just do. :p
'Nyways, I liked how she appeared to be the victim, a human no less, but then she obviously wasn't. I had an inkling that she wouldn't be human by the end of the story, but I didn't expect her to not be from the start. Hah. Nice twist.
| FuckMeAlice chapter 1 . 8/16/2008
Okay that was twisted.
I was laughing at the end. The twist end. I thought Julie as going to be an old-fashioned victim, but she doesn't seem very victimized, does she? I'm sorry, I suck at writing reviews. I love this story.
| S. M. Saves chapter 1 . 8/3/2008
Whoa! Creepy and intense. I thought she was going to be the one attacked but I guess not. Good job!
| eamane tinuviel chapter 1 . 7/26/2008
ergh. i haven't read a good grisly, stomach churning story in a while.
this takes the cake (or newly dead Latino guy, in this case)
i like how you approached the whole zombie subject in a different way. i thought julie was human until i got to the end, which was a very good twist.
i guess my only suggestion is to fix the last two lines:
"It told her that she was completely in the right, because if she wasn't supposed to eat the warm yummy fleshy people around her? Then they shouldn't taste so damned good to hungry little zombie girls like her the morning after."
isn't it supposed to be a comma, not a question mark? or did you do that intentionally?
sorry.. i'm pretty much OCD when it comes to punctuation *puts head down in shame*
overall, great story!
| Caecilia chapter 1 . 7/24/2008
WOW! What a twist. I thought your ending line was hilarious!
I really like the beginning with your description of how hard it was for her to think.
Great story, your descriptions are amazing.
I think the ending is funny, sorry if it's not supposed to be (just a morbid sense of humor for me I guess)
| TheOnyxKeyMaster chapter 1 . 7/24/2008
First, What is going on? And second, I dont know if anyone would go through the effort to read this story it rambles on and one and half the time I was wondering "When is this story going to get to a least one simple point?" Srry I am srry
| dragonflydreamer chapter 1 . 7/16/2008
The Roadhouse is running out of beer! Follow the link in my profile to help save it (and spread reviews all around fp!)
Haha, the ending was, erm . . . interesting!
I like how I could get such a good sense of how Julie was feeling. You introduced what had happened at a good pace, making me want to know more about the previous night like Julie.
Not much I'd suggest to change with this. I think you used the name "Julie" a bit excessively, so try to avoid that. Also, in the first paragraph:
"eyes when her eyelids forced themselves to finally open. She squinted a little, letting her hurting eyes" - 'Eyes' was used too much for such a short period of time.
Overall, very nice job!