|Reviews for The Opal Fox|
| AranaBanana chapter 23 . 10/23/2009
I finished reading the last chapter at like 3 am this morning, so I was too tired to review (it would have been far from understandable anyway). But well, lazy as I am, I figured it would be a good idea to give you a word of encouragement, else you wouldn't keep updating. I hope you realise that I'm doing you a great honor, not everyone can boast about being reviwed by the Great Banana (don't hit me please).
But yeah, your fic was really awesome, with appealling characters and a very nice plot. I think the only thing I could criticize is the fact that it's not finished (I usually don't read unfinished fictions, because then I would have thousands of them, and would probably forget the story by the time a new chapter is added).
Anyway, keep the good work up, and I hope you won't ever give up on this story cuz it rocks!
| AlijaS117 chapter 23 . 10/22/2009
Things are finally heating up between Emory and Aura! can't wait for the next chapter! update soon !
| TymCon chapter 23 . 10/22/2009
Well this was god. Aw the vampire thing sounded kinda funny. I must admit this would be better as a book. Its kinda hard to remember characters when you wait for an update. Anyway well is anne trying to attract a fiarie groom? Im prob wrong:P
| fredsbank chapter 23 . 10/22/2009
I really don't like Emory and Aura together. I know I'm probably in the minority here, I just don't like that he's so cocky and seems to get anything he wants. Oh well. I seem to remember it's a story about these two, so I'll have to live with it.
Besides my Emory-hate, I love the story!
| Tawny Owl chapter 23 . 10/22/2009
It feels like we cover a lot of ground with this chapter, but then we do go half way across the kingdom. I loved some of the description in this: the forest dragons with their stubby wings and John with his mouth hanging open. As always I love the way you seize on certain details and expand on them because it makes the scenery seem so much more vibrant.
I loved the description of the butler as well, and how a good servant can let you know of their disapproval without actually speaking. He seems like such a well rounded character for what I presume is going to be a minor player. And the idea that he and his wife are at opposite ends of the country for the good of everyone else was hilarious.
May favourite bit though has to be Emory walking out of the court room. I was on the edge of my seat wanting to see what he was going to say, but the fact that he didn’t even bother was so much better. He is a very interesting character because there seems to be so much more beneath the surface. I liked the interaction between him and aura at the beginning. It was sweet, but funny too and you portrayed Aura’s indecision really well with wanting to run. The Councillor’s hungry look doesn’t bode well though…
“Oh yes, I have had such a difficult time getting you alone here to do you in that we all decided it would be better if the action moved to a different city – this sentence kind of got away from me a bit. I think it’s the ‘to do you in’ you mean kill him? I think you could probably phrase it better. There were some great lines in this too though. My favourite has to be Aura’s logic behind why Emory had to wait a week before he could go to Nantal won though.
Anne’s plan to sneak of and have a look at a bridegroom is interesting as well, as is her turning up looking like Tinkerbell. I am looking forward to seeing how all the threads are going to come together because it does feel like when ever something like that happens it is going to be important later.
Forty more chapters though, wow. I may have to read the beginning again. And well done for the cuts. I find it very hard to do that. You could always post the vampire hatred as an out take or something. I’m intrigued by the idea of keeping one as a pet.
| Tawny OWl chapter 22 . 9/30/2009
The contrasts in Marie were sudden – shouting and then cooing was quite a spin around. But it made sense as she is such a passionate character. It was nice to see her centre stage as well because it always feels like she’s a bit overshadowed by Aura.
I was glad that Emory was there, and dishevelled Demsby: he always feels so outrageous. It was strange that Aura had the page in the book marked if she didn’t know she was going to be called. I would have been more willing to believe that she could recall it of by heart because she had studied the book. Actually having the page marked seemed more premeditated.
The other thing thats tuck out was that the success felt a bit too easy. Not that I didn't like seeing the Dielle sisters trashing the establishment, but it would have been more satisying if they'd had some close calls as well.
That said I loved the misdirection when asked whether Marie did threaten the soldiers – it was brilliant the way she called the whole thing into question.
The strolling along with hands in her pockets seemed out of places. I know it's possible that dresses have them but I imagin the dresses as big seventeenth century numbers so having hand sin pockets made the posture and bearing feel wrong. Does that make sense?. Although this Aura with her underworld connections so heigh ho.
The tapestry moving without breeze was wonderfully sinister.
The kiss was sweet, I don’t normally like that word but it was. It was also really telling with the fact that Aura didn’t shove him because there was no one to see. And that if anyone found out she’d blame it on him. That was a good way to end the chapter I liked the emotional out burst as well because I either hadn’t realised, or forgotten between updates, how alone Aura actually feels.
| CuppyFox chapter 22 . 9/28/2009
Goodness Gracious, this story just gets better and cuter and twistier every time you put up a new chapter. I love it. You're definitely going to get published by any company you send this in to. And if you don't i think I'd get more than a little upset. XD Amazing.
| Outlaw's Daughter chapter 22 . 9/27/2009
Great chapter! Loved the end, though it definitely wouldn't have been right without that last line!
| daeth chapter 22 . 9/27/2009
Aww what a good chapter, i was wondering when they were going to kiss, it will be interesting to see what happens next thought.
Hope you update soon.
| AlijaS117 chapter 22 . 9/26/2009
Aww! yay they kiss finally! The last scene was so cute! please update soon!
| TymCon chapter 22 . 9/26/2009
Love the last line in this. You did the court case very well, i wouldve been so annoyed if you didnt:P I love court stuff. So they finally make out! Woho!
| Tawny Owl chapter 21 . 9/13/2009
I think I don’t want Freddy to be bad because he has some really good lines – alternatively though good lines do make for a good villain. Although wasn’t there a discussion a little while ago about the baddies name beginning with a ‘J’?
Good observations as well about liking the shouting and trying not to be angry but letting people know that you are.
The door opens? She put the bolt across. Although Anne is a sorceress…
Fey and toothy – wonderful if slightly sinister image.
The best bit in the court was the Chinese whispers when the King realised that Charles wasn’t there. Although the description of the room and the way you set it up with the comment about the illustrations not doing justice to the details. The description actually reminded me of the interior of some of the big previously official buildings in London.
The thumb war was a good way to show the time dragging. But didn’t really fit in with the tense atmosphere of everything else.
I’m still not 100% sure on why Charles got out of turning up – something to do with him being a knight and therefore not a member of the King’s court (presumably because he is head of the opposition?) This means that he has no legal standing to pretty much do any thing. Have I got that right? So I’m presuming their uncle isn’t a knight. I think I need to go and check the family tree again. It’s hard to remember when you’re reading as something is being updated.
I did like the conversations between Aura and her father though – it feels like now she’s grown up they are kind of equal because they are both involved in their own political machinations. I got the impression that he’s finding it hard to see his daughter grow up like that. Maybe marrying her off is the only way he feels he can stay in control.
| JennWin chapter 21 . 9/13/2009
I love this story! but i can't wait till the next chapter comes out! lol. do you have an idea of when it will be out? yet again I love this story... it's amazing!
| CalyWraith chapter 21 . 9/13/2009
haha wow I love this! At first I thought it was going to be one of those cookie-cutter damsel in distress types, but I love what you've done and I LOVE Aurelie's character! Like, sh*t man. This is freakin awsome! Have you considered getting this published? It's really good. Keep it up and I can't wait to read more! :D
| TymCon chapter 21 . 9/12/2009
I love courtroom stuff:P cant wait for next chapter! wonder what annie wants aurelie for? I geuss well fine out. Cool so there not just trying to mjurder the princes, there trying to give them an embarasing death. Good chapter.