Reviews for Robot Girls Weren't Built to Feel
fairies and snapple chapter 1 . 1/20/2010
This is really incredible. I love how each verse stands on its own, but takes on more meaning with the chapter (?) title. And even though it's short and sparse, you get the sense of this whole, huge, tragic story.
Maziana chapter 1 . 7/7/2008
This poem looks so awesome, and I'm sorry I cannot properly read it right now - I have to do something boring and important. But I will return! The prologue is so creative and emotional and interesting that I have to at least attempt to honor it properly with a good review. I will return! :D
Solemn Coyote chapter 1 . 7/4/2008

That said, I'm going to try and review more thoroughly.

1) I'm kinda amazed that, in some small way, 'Chobits' helped inspire this. I would have expected something much, much darker. 'Ghost in the Shell' or 'Eden' or somesuch. Still, it's sort of a testament to your writing ability that the poem is so different from its inspiration.

2)"& A hollowed familiar voice whi(screams)spers, to the Worthless," You do things with sentence structure and punctuation that I was not aware could be done. Reading your poetry is becoming a regular inspiration.

3) I don't know if you've ever heard of the band Coheed & Cambria (I guess they're getting popular now?) but I get the same feeling reading this poem that I get trying to decode their lyrics. There's a plot buried in here. I'm sure there is, but it's not easy at all to find.

4)"My sister sketches a girl on the street,

With a pen.

Copies her pose,

& Legs, her body.

(Not her heart

Never her heart

They never seem as beautiful

On paper.)"

That sort of made me laugh. There's philosophical content to it, too, of course, but it's nice to see some humor keeping the poem in balance.








Okay, what you did there was cool. Bolding 'God' so the reader pauses on it and splits one sequence into two ideas: "We don't have a God/We don't have a God-given hope."

At least, I think I'm interpreting that correctly.

6)"(We wish to feel,

But we were not built that way.)" As far as I'm concerned, wanting to feel pretty much makes you human, but I'm sure that's a theory robots wouldn't come easily to.

7) Sequence IX, demon, is probably the strongest part of the entire poem. Partly because it gives the characters an external conflict instead of one that's internal and existential.

8) Once again, I find myself strongly interested in what happens to the characters *after* the poem. If you ever feel like using these characters again, I'd love to see a continuation of their story...which is probably a terribly unpoetic thing for me to say, since you've reached a pretty strong conclusion in this piece, but there it is all the same.

9) Oh, and keep writing. I got the impression from your review that you were kind of uncertain about your abilities. Don't be. I wish I could write like this. It's so completely different from what I usually do.

rebeldork chapter 1 . 6/29/2008
This is freaking good. I like it a lot... I think I understand it, and it makes me sad. Very well written. Great piece here :)