Reviews for Destiny's Impact |
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![]() ![]() ![]() kya! Cool fic! Please update ASAP! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hey, I added you to Docx under your pen name, you can send anything you want me to go through :) I definitly liked the chapter- though I think you need to work on descriptios a bit. Like after Phoenix shot the guy he was suddenly next to him in seconds- that could make readers confused- try writing descriptions of sounds and backgrounds- maybe even some semi-dramatic stuff, like 'the blood in my veins ran cold' or 'seconds turned into minutes, minutes into hours' stuff like that :) Sorry if I got your message late- we've got a mini family feud at home so I'm kinda occupied with all the yelling... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Woah... Aw that's no fair! Sometimes I hate cliffhangers... *pouts* It was really great but up to the point where they got shot at I still thougt they were in the train. I got really confused but apart from that everything else was great. I definetly liked the way you ended the chapter and flashback, it was real exciting. Well hurry and update I'll be waiting but I'm not very patient l8erz, kAoRi |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow! Truly a five star story! I definetly like the way you portraied their first encounter and the surprising speed Lily has when changing moods . Great Job, keep it up! You're now in my Fav Authors and Stories list... d-b |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hi, it's me again, I'm sorry you didn't get a new reviewer yet but I'm recommending you to a friend as I type :) This chapter was good but seemed a bit rushed. I noticed a few mis-spellings and grammar mistakes, otherwise it's good. Don't stress yourself to write eveyrthing quickly and perfectly, alright? Go on your own pace and don't be bothered if there are no reviews straight away. I've just E-mail two of my friends to see if they'll read it. Hope it helps |
![]() ![]() ![]() *squeals* SO MUCH IMPROVEMENT! Perfect, A, Super- I can find no fault in this chapter! You displayed the characters well and didn't give out too much information and I really like that small dramatic part at the beginning. Great, absolutely brilliant :) I really want to read more P.S: I see you've updated your profile (No, I'm not keeping tabs on you mister, but I noticed the change when I went over there for the thousandth time to read your story) and here I was searching like mad for a fanfic account with the word toshiro (cuz you said he was awesome and his name has 7 letters) and 3 numbers in it so I could somehow find it and give you a heart attack- when all the time it was AirDragon717. My God, I feel like cursing you but that would be taking away your motto. |