Reviews for The Passion
Amethyst M. Benson chapter 1 . 9/17/2008
Once again, awesome job!
May Elizabeth chapter 1 . 8/28/2008
This is a nice piece of prose. This could also make a great story beginning. Great job. You wrote this in grade 6? WOW! That's really good for a sixth grader. :D Peace.
inkspatters chapter 1 . 8/1/2008
Wow! You were one talented sixth grader. Sometimes I look back at my stuff from primary school and it amazes me that some was actually good, this is like that. It's wonderful and short and succint. I think that as we get older we become more flowery and lose the wonderful directness things like this piece.

The description was there, the action was there and your hook - the first line - was great. My only criticism? You have a typo in the second last sentence. 'Your and your horse' should be changed to 'You and your horse' but then, it's perfectly understandable if that's they way you wrote it in the sixth grade and you want to keep it that way.

Yeah, basically, I liked this a lot.

-Ink-
Love And Feathers chapter 1 . 7/27/2008
aww

that was cute

and that was good, especially for a sixth grader

i bet your teachers thought it was really good too
The Hippie Nerd chapter 1 . 7/8/2008
I've never ridden on a horse before (maybe when I was really young as some sort of kiddie attraction, but that isn't the same thing)... But I was able to envision the experience wonderfully from what you wrote. A great piece, very descriptive, and your passion for horse riding definitely shines through. Bravo!