Reviews for Savior's Dream
PoetryQueen chapter 1 . 8/12/2008
This was pretty good. Two things though. You describe God's love for us like a bride and groom in the beginning. I don't agree with that, but that is just my own oponion, it's not really a problem.

Second, I think that you should bold the to in the last line so it's more powerful.

I still liked this piece. It is so true... We betray God, but he welcomes us back. Great job!
yodel a blue streak chapter 1 . 7/14/2008
You run from me, but I pursue

Each step you take, I'm there with you

...My heart for you burns with desire

...An all-consuming, lover’s fire

I guess I like the "lover's fire" analogy cuz I have a love/hate, attraction/revulsion, sort of experience with religion and the image compares well with the intensity/complexity of that.

The rondeau style sounds neat. Might have to try it.
JC-Saved-Me chapter 1 . 7/12/2008
oh my goodness, this is exactly the heartbeat of God. A few weeks ago I was in prayer and this is the Lord showed me He was feeling for me and His Bride global. I loved the expression and the format.

xRachx
drafts of ka chapter 1 . 7/12/2008
The formatting does matter. I'm a bit less confused now. I also fight with it every time to get it close to how I want it. Anywho, the poem. I like it a lot. It, once again, gives me a different perspective of God. You're good at that. I think you used the wrong "who's/whose", though.