nice chipter

I've never bothered finishing a story this poorly written (in terms of grammar, spelling, typos and both narrative and plot logic), but the fact that I did stick this one out until the end proves that it's got something. I hope that you revisit this some day in the distand future and redo it all properly. Aside from using the wrong words (warped instead of wrapped) and the excessive spelling mistakes, some things were either too random, out of character or didn't make sense. Like Ashley's 6-inch wound which is bleeding all over the place but doesn't hurt enough to stop him from enjoying the morning wind and Mesuda's hardness at his ass... Or Alana sleeping in the middle of a battle.

With fantasy, a lot rides on suspension of belief, but there are boundaries to how much (or little) actions, reactions and events can be grounded in logic.

Thanks for sharing, at any rate. It was fun at times, painful at others, but overall interesting.

From the first chapter until this one I kept saying if only it was a movie. Thank you for the story.

This is a really interesting story. The characterization of the characters are great.

Hopefully you can create a sequel one day, Im really curious what happens to everyone after.

this is confusing... i guess i'll just have to keep reading

hmm...this story needs a beta like whoa.

but it's a really intriguing story. good with character development and pacing. description adds realism but doesn't get so heavy as to slow down the plot.

i only wish there was more. I was shocked to see the ending, and, while i can appreciate post-modern abruptness as much as the next person, you seem to be building for more and then letting it go.

on the whole, this story shows great promise. thanks for sharing. keep up the good work.

Nice idea for the story, I like your characters as well. May I suggest proof-reading, because there are a number of simple errors (for instead of four, their instead of they're) to fix. Don't stop reading, this is a really good start. I would like to see more of your work.

Really great story! :)

And I would love for you to write a sequel, because I still had alot of unanswered questions at the end... and anyway I would just love to read more about them :)

wtf! only 38 reviews?

thats ridiculous!

this story deserves WAY more than that!

but yeah... amazing story.

you should consider making a sequil!

Just by the prologue alone, i ahve been drawn in with the promise of good writing..and thats just the prologue, i cant wait to read the rest of the story!

YEAH! they finally merged. I wonder how Ashley is going to coupe or if he'll even really time who he was. It's a confusing concept. Hopefully now we will see more of Masuda and the pack as a whole. the constant running is exhausting. :) great job!

Hardcore!

You're story is interesting yet the more I read I get confused. I want some to help him beside himself. His instincts are good though so I'm not worried about him falling into a trap. :) great job!

Man everyone wants Ashley, gees, everything sucks for him!

*sigh* and Masuda is gone again. It's cool that we know what the tattoo is though.