|Reviews for Extraordinary|
| blackflier chapter 1 . 8/19/2012
I like how you gave a faint illusion of a student in love with her teacher, or something like that. . (At least, thats what I read into it.), because everyone can relate to it.
I also really liked the use of magic, because it adds extra mystery to the 'great love' (and i'm a fantasy geek. ;p )
An late review from the review marathon, sorry for the delay. Feel free to ignore the review, becuase I never got Poetry.
| Luna Turner chapter 1 . 3/9/2010
I agree that you left the last "me" without italics. I love the comparison in this poem, and how you changed up the word "extraordinary."
| Chasing Skylines chapter 1 . 4/25/2009
I liked the magic and how one of the characters in this was a wizard, for the fantastical effect of it, and fantastic is a synonym of extraordinary.
[I 'll always be an extra ordinary girl]
There shouldn't be that space after I. I liked this part for the play on words, even though I've seen it before.
I liked the ending, realistic and concluded with your last play on the word.
- Review Marathon, link in profile.
| Kate Marshall chapter 1 . 4/18/2009
I thought this whole thing was really very clever. The idea of it had a nice imagery to it. I had a lot of fun reading it. And most people can relate to what you're writing in this. So good...topic choice. :D
But as much as I liked it, the poem did lack a definite rhythm. So that took away from the enjoyment a bit. A rhyme here and there would've helped.
"wishing there was enough magic
to make him love ordinary me."
Love that. I thought it was a perfect ending for this. Not exactly a dream ending, but fitting. Realistic, too. :)
-Peach, Review Squader review!
| improvisationallychallenged chapter 1 . 3/4/2009
Hello - I was complaining of boredom and snooping for where to offload some free reviews, and Frac sent me in your direction...
The use of 'extra ordinary' is pretty darn brilliant here. It is truly amazing thing how one little space can send the meaning of a word rocketing to the other end of the english language.
I admit, sifting through poetry for meaning is not really my thing - I respect it, and even appreciate it once someone has taken the kindness to thwack me over the head with the true meaning (and I mean that literally...oh the bruises I got during English A-level...)but exactly what the wizard and the girl was was a tiny bit lost on me. Could it be power-play in relationships (how one partner usually sees the other as being cooler/smarter/more fun/confident/attractive than they are?)
That's the only thought I could come up with.
Meanings aside, this is a cute, and quite bittersweet read. You really feel for this girl, who sees herself as so inadequate, but hopes she's good enough anyway. It's amazing what little triggers can produce.
| Child of the Creatures chapter 1 . 1/2/2009
Ohh, I like this! .
| Sabriel Griffin chapter 1 . 12/15/2008
Over all I like it. However I think you should have italicized the word ordinary because it would create similarity between the opening and closing lines of the poem.
I love the idea of word play in this piece; but the poem over all some time lost me. I found may self having to go back and reread it a few times. Not that rereading is a bad thing, but in this case I think that because you are playing with the definition of words, it would be better if the poem was elaborate more, making the message clearer to the reader on the fist time through.
~ Sabriel Griffin
| WarCape chapter 1 . 11/27/2008
I like it, actually.
I like the way it's written too.
Sorry, can't really think of much else to say xD apart from the fact it's brilliant and you should keep on writing. (:
| heartbroken922 chapter 1 . 11/24/2008
i think you should italicize the word 'ordinary' in the last line. it emphasizes the fact that he's something 'extraordinary' to you.
| megamegaturtle chapter 1 . 11/21/2008
First off, I must say that you are an amazing poet.
I do enjoy the italics. I'm a sucker for those.
However, I must say that the last stanza made me a little disappointed. You started off very strong with your first three. Your finishing though was a bit weak. To me, if you would have italized ordinary it would have made the stazna *pop*! from the rest of the poem. The reason for this is because it would be the only word.
I like line 4 because it proves that whomever it is, is very amazing. Yet I am confused at the same time if it is the girl or the person she has strong feelings for.
All in all, I really did enjoy this poem. It was bit Harry Potter-ish feeling, but lines 15 and 16, made me smile because it makes all feel a little special.
| Celdover chapter 1 . 11/21/2008
I liked how you played around with the wording. I felt like it expressed the poem really well. And I really liked the rhythm you used for the poem. It made the poem have a nice flow, and I really enjoyed it.
| Isca chapter 1 . 11/20/2008
"A wizard concoting his newest spell." That line fit perfectly after the idea of wanting someone to be extraordinary. The second stanza is powerful and honest; it has no flaws! The third stanza, however, was my favourite; I just found myself smiling the whole way through. I'd give you concrit, but I don't have any! Although, I do think that 'ordinary' should be italicized in at the end.
| Fractured Illusion chapter 1 . 10/31/2008
Hello champion of the Review Marathon! You won so here is your prize! D
"a sense of understanding
because even he was naïve once."
This has got to be the favorite lines in this poem (the ending comes pretty close also, though). It was very good because it made the wizard seem even more sort of evil, you know? He WAS naive, not anymore (now he is apparently a very unsatisfied person) It makes him come off as cruel and I think that made a good addition to this poem :) Also, I like it when people change for the worse, hoho.
"I 'll always"
There is not supposed to be space there :o
I like the poem, but there are some wordings you could cut to make it better. This one bothered me the most:
This is a pretty cliché expression. I don't think you need to rely on those.
In general though, I have to say I liked the parallel of extraordinary and extra ordinary. You made it work well, and I think it was a good choice to not use italics on the ordinary since we all notice it anyways ) It'd seem too obvious with italics there. So you made the right choice.
The italics that you have though, I like those. I think it was a good way of portraying dialog, I understood it pretty quickly. :)
Good work dude! D
- Frac, from the Review Marathon Prize Committee
| May Elizabeth chapter 1 . 10/29/2008
This is a really good poem. I like it. Oh yeah before I forget you are a beautiful person. Peace.
| ilovetheopera chapter 1 . 10/20/2008
I think a lot of lines in this poem are weak and should/could be gotten rid of. Uh I could see some strong lines in this poem even though I think the theme is rather juvenile, so to make this poem stronger you could probably cut a lot of it. From what I've read, though, that's probably not your style.
Also, the first two verses left me confused as to who was the extraordinary/desperate/whatever one in the poem, and the italicised lines did not help. Um sometimes confused readers are good but I don't think this is the case.
Essentially quite a convoluted poem, needs some work to be truly extraordinary, I think.