|Reviews for Love Hurts|
| BlibberyBlub chapter 1 . 4/10/2010
I was born on June 13th, Friday the 13th. Isn't it funny how people find it unlucky? Anyway, creepy story, but you know, like a good kind of creepy! I love horror stories, and this one was good!
| Lady-on-the-Barricades chapter 1 . 9/27/2008
You know how to write a really good, sad horror story. You should extend this because it's really well written. Keep up the awesome work. :D
| Ben.nes13 chapter 1 . 7/31/2008
The story is really good, i loved it. It's even a bit spooky and chilling, but i think it could use some touching up by a Beta Reader, i have one very good one who also submits her story on this site. She corrects brilliantly, and i really love having her, makes it much easier to correct my books chapters. Her username is Aoife129, and i recommend her fervently.
By the way, is the story going to continue?
| Spurlunk chapter 1 . 7/30/2008
Okay. Your story was not bad. There were several typos, for example:
No but it is pretty freaky out here at night. (You need a comma after No)
Well, it is said that one summers night in 1947, sometime in November, it is said that one of the students (a boarder, as it was a boarding school at that time) boyfriend sneaked into the school and met with his girlfriend. He led her to the little grove, down by the boathouse and while he was kissing her he stabbed her to death - Here you said it is said twice, which is redundant. Also, people don't talk with parenthesis, and I think the information in your parenthesis is probably not necessary anyway.
Apparently, another student at the time, one Annabelle Hetherington, told the boy (whose name was Jack Winchester) that his girlfriend (who was known as Elizabeth Smithe) was cheating on him. -Same here, no need for the parenthesis. Just put a comma and their names.
It’s no real
‘You cab pay in their stead
Written on the walls in large re letters were the words…’Love Hurts’
Your story is pretty well written, but it's kind of cliche. Though it's a bit different, I feel like I've heard it before. Perhaps that was what you were going for though.
| Rebecca Roy chapter 1 . 7/30/2008
Chilling but very good.