|Reviews for Masquerade|
| Raansu Bell chapter 1 . 12/19/2008
Wow nick. this is pretty chilling. I like it, despite its brevity, but it does seem to be a prologue to a longer and deeper story. maybe you should make it into a longer short story?
| J.W. Hargrove-MystMan chapter 1 . 8/20/2008
Very good. This was creepy... and I want to figure out what happens!
Maybe this should be a prologue?
Anyhow, there was one little mishap I noticed- "...mahogany floor. His blood seeped into the rough grain of the mahogany floor..."
You'll notice that that repitition being so close is really quite annoying... ha ha.
| Keimei-chan chapter 1 . 8/2/2008
Wow, the strange violence made this interesting and somewhat scary.
Short, but good.
By the way, when you're referring to a possesion of someone, it's 'its' not it's...ugh, that was confusing to explain.
Anyways, nicely done!
| fatbird33 chapter 1 . 8/2/2008
oo this is super dark and sad. but good
| S. M. Saves chapter 1 . 8/2/2008
The scene crafted in this piece was generously detailed. He didn't just flop to the floor dead, you dragged it out second by second which was very nice. I only wish it was longer.
| Tranquil Thorns chapter 1 . 8/1/2008
Some very creepy images - the knife and blood, not to mention the masked figure - but I think it would be a better story if you made it a little longer and focused more on details. As it is I thought it sounded a bit rushed, as if you jumped from idea to idea with not enough description in-between.
Also, the ending had me confused. It just seemed... random, for lack of a better word.
(it's face/it's neck it's should be its)
Keep on writing!
| gnometea chapter 1 . 8/1/2008
Oh, I like this story! It has such potential for a much more intricate plot. So mysterious. Very nice!