Reviews for Choice
ThatEmKid chapter 1 . 10/13/2008
A really cute oneshot about making choices - my description of this story. I find it really cute. Great fic. _
Kyllorac chapter 1 . 8/13/2008
Review Game!

The circumstances surrounding the narrator and the bus are vague; too vague, especially since you write in the last sentence that missing the bus was the best choice in the narrator's life. There seems to be no basis for this claim. You hint that getting on the bus is not a good thing, so why is the narrator determined to do so throughout most of the story?

The bit with boy and Way was nice, but I don't see how it relates to, and thus affects, the narrator. If their situation is somehow analogous to the narrator's situation, you'll need to draw more connections between the two. As it stands, the two things (the boy and the sparrow and the narrator's unmentioned choice) are tied together only by a single, unsteady thread - that they both involve choice of some sort. What kind of choice and the effects of both choices aren't addressed.

I think the main issue with this piece is the vagueness. "What kind of choice is the narrator making?" and "How does it relate with the choice the boy and sparrow make?" are two important questions that do not seem to be answered. See if you can answer them (or hint at the answers more clearly) within the story, and I think you'll find that this will become a stronger piece. :D
SafeForEternity chapter 1 . 8/2/2008
This was a really neat idea. I love little stories like this that go deeper than what to words actually say.
LadyGawain chapter 1 . 8/2/2008
The narrator's hot :P I liked the ending because it's open ended! What was the choice he made? It's up to the reader to decide!