Reviews for Boy Bride
unorthodox chapter 4 . 1/11/2011
whoa. that would NOT have been me. If he had my diary,all HEL would have broken loose.

I wonder. . . . . . what's Jibriel think about this?

Continue with the brilliaNCE
reeby10 chapter 9 . 8/22/2010
Oh I really like this story! Jibriel is so utterly adorable
teddii.bear chapter 9 . 8/22/2010
please please please please please update D
ami-mochi1 chapter 1 . 8/15/2010
This story is awesome awesome awesome. Now that I've made an account I can say this. I love this! It's so well written, and I can't wait to see where it's going. Great job!
SassyGrl chapter 9 . 6/12/2010
woo
yaoi8808 chapter 1 . 4/6/2010
wow, this is really good :)
JibrielFan chapter 9 . 3/14/2010
omg I LOVE THIS STORY! i have to know what happens next! JibriXLeon
naraka chapter 9 . 3/6/2010
this story picked my curiosity so I decided to give it a shot, and I don't regret doing so. it's interesting, the plot reminds me off far away kingdoms and different cultures, jibriel himself has a very unique name ;)

leonhart (his name can be a thousand jokes...) is a good alpha, by his actions, and although he is sometimes awkward or embarrassed with jibri, I think his manner, the way he pretends not to notice his own blush, or the way he grits his teeth, spatting and leaving the room with the wizard smiling smugly behind is the actions of a king because he can't really show emotions, (sometimes he's childish too... I guess his young age still influences him), he learned on his position how to behave and be a responsible leader.

jibriel's past is so sad, specially what happened to his family and hazam, who seemed like a good fiancé... hopefully he'll find someone to love just as much... hopefully he'll notice how the prince and he are such a good couple... hopefully I'm not babbling here and there will be smex in the future... ku ku ku...

myrddin may be meddlesome but he does it to push the king into being with jibri since the man himself doesn't take actions... sometimes he pushes to far, acts before he thinks, but I really think he does it with a good heart and the prophecies in mind. n_n Nana is a good character too, alwasy kind hearted and aiding jibri when needed.

I gotta say my opinion of Beowulf changed drastically, he was such a bastard at the beginning, treating "silverfish" like he was a whore, but thankfully he showed his true colors and they are considerably different from the first impression he gave.

I'll be looking forward to the next chapter!
Nameless Shana chapter 8 . 2/26/2010
one is in denial and one is kind of confused. I wonder what will happen o.o...
Nameless Shana chapter 5 . 2/26/2010
The denial he is in is kind of funny. I like how you made males can mate. I think this way is creative.
Nameless Shana chapter 4 . 2/26/2010
XD. Is that the reaction he was looking for?
Nameless Shana chapter 3 . 2/26/2010
this story is really good. the first chapter kept me holding on but the second chapter was kind of choppy. It seems it was going to fast.
XxGOTHICxANGELxX chapter 9 . 2/22/2010
AW!This story is one of the best i've read!I luv ur style and cant wait to read the next chapter
ger chapter 9 . 2/8/2010
I just read what you have writen so far and I must say that it is very good even thou it is a bit raw. So here is to a happy ending.

GER
Laela chapter 9 . 2/4/2010
Oh man, I hate leaving unsigned reviews... but really, my account on here hasn't been touched in four years and is a little embarrassing to be honest.

I'm really enjoying this story; I have it bookmarked and all. Since you ask for concrit, I decided to review and give you a little - I'm really sorry if I sound harsh, I'm truely enjoying this, but you mentioned you have a hard time looking at your own work objectively and man, I know that feeling. I like giving concrit to people who I can tell really care about improving, so it's really a compliment I'm taking the time to write this :3

The most noticable thing that I notice that feels a bit off is the pacing - not in the relationships within the story, but the scenes themselves. Much of the time I find that you summarize things a little, which is an easy trap to fall into. I'd love to see some things expanded on, see more interaction between some of the characters. Your dialogue is quite good and character-developing and I'd like to see more of it.

On that note, I think it's affecting the way some of your characters come across. Most noticably Jibri himself - I can tell, I really can, that's he's a vivid and alive character in your mind, but I don't feel I care about him as much as I could. Reading between the lines a bit and making a few assumptions, I think I know who he is, but I'd really like to see it come out in text.

Finally, I'd really like to compliment you on your improvement throughout this story. It started off quite well but has become noticeably stronger throughout. I hope you update soon!

Sorry again if I sounded a bit harsh or anything - I just want to help, not offend you! Since I have to leave an anon review like a lameass, feel free to email me at crazy_authoress at hotmail dot com to discuss or reply or what have you.
183 | « Prev Page 1 2 3 4 5 12 .. Last Next »