|Reviews for Do You See Me?|
| Isca chapter 1 . 9/1/2008
The idea that someone looks in the mirror and wonder why it hasn't cracked yet was amazing and really powerful!
"Your glory asphyxiates me always." INCREDIBLE LINE!
"You don't even notive how much you are coveted." Seriously, if you keep writing lines like that, you're going to outshine us all :P
"I may have to become you if you leave." *Tries to find the right words to praise this line.* *Fails miserably, as it's beyond phenomenal*
| Samantha Marie Haven chapter 1 . 8/22/2008
oh i liked this a lot!
you said you didn't like the flow, or something like that, but i really didn't find a problem with it. it was absorbing as it was, and not hard to follow (if that was what you meant by the flow).
i'm agreeing with your other reviewers about the last line being powerful, and i'm adding the line about self destructing in 5 seconds to the 'powerful line' list.
everything about this poem is shocking in the sense that it just grabs you and forces you to see things you might not have before. i loved it. keep writing and happy writing!
| chartonjeremiah chapter 1 . 8/17/2008
I have to agree with Kloun Doll. That last line is quite strong.
| wo bu ai ni le chapter 1 . 8/12/2008
Yeah I do see you. We're in the same position..
| lymli chapter 1 . 8/11/2008
I like the question part and the ending "This person will replace you in 5 seconds..." is a very powerful sentence, a lot of people think they're special, but don't sometimes.
it's a great writing.