Reviews for what has not been done before
lymli chapter 1 . 10/22/2008
I like the rhyme from this, specially the last verse.
Moon-Chaser chapter 1 . 10/22/2008
I really liked this, the whole tone and the way that you ended it.

I like the last line in the italic/bold, such a good final statment.

Keep it up.
brightest darkness chapter 1 . 10/19/2008
Review game...

I disliked the format because part of it Rhymed and some of it didn't.

I loved the fact that the poem suggested that something big will happen when all of our minds run together in on single thought.
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 10/18/2008
I know you just joined the Review Game, but maybe check out the Review Marathon (link in my profile).

I like your kinda sorta rhyming here and there, it's interesting. Something that confused me though was the last line. Is it part of the piece of an a/n? If it's part of the piece, I don't like the bolding and italicizing, it seems out of place. If it's an a/n you should specify that.

I like the piece, the whole idea behind it is really great and true. I also like your descriptions, well done.

PS If you're bored check out the Review Game forum and/or it's Review Marathon (link in my profile).
Ashelin chapter 1 . 10/17/2008
I finally see what people mean when they critisize me for not using punctuation. It's impossible for me to see, because I know the exact flow of my poetry, exactly how it should go, and WHY there is no punctuation. But I come here, and I think "Oh, that first line needs a question mark" and a whole bunch of idiocies which I have laughed at countless times before. Oh well. I can't tell you to use punctuation, I'll just have to do my best to understand.

I see where you are going with this poem, the "nothing new under the sun" the idea that ever idea has been so stretched thin by so many people, it's originallity and interestingness have faded. Though I can't say I truly agree. Yes, a poem about love is a poem about love. But there are stories which have been told over over again in different ways, with different images and different ways of saying it. I do agree that often times, the same ideas are represented with the same exact words, making you feel like it is the same poem that was just put in a blender and chopped up, then aranged again in poetic form. But I think that is something all poets must go through to learn. It is about making new out of the old. Because truly, no new ideas are new. They are old ones, sometimes multiple old ones, made into something no one has heard precisely the way it is being said before. Perhaps that doesn't make sense, and I'm taking away from your poem some by going into this. I'm sorry.

I liked your own originality of form, free-verse in a non sort of free-verse way, at least as I see it. Though I don't agree with everything in your poem, most specifically the last line, I do respect your opinions and thoughts.

As for my poetry, thank you for the reviews. I'm sorry to say for your sake that most of my poetry is more like the poem you didn't like as well, "Hopeless Hope" rather than "Stone". I am not an excellent poet, I am a mediocre one. Sometimes I write well, sometimes I don't. There are things people love, there are things people hate, there are things that people have no interest in whatsoever. But I thank you for taking the time to review my things and make your own opinions about them.

Keep writing.

As Always

Ashelin
Damien21 chapter 1 . 10/6/2008
awesome statement. i agree with you totally