Reviews for Gallagher and the Whale
Kate Marshall chapter 1 . 12/27/2008
"It’s a sick curiosity, as Gallagher would have phrased it, what makes people crowd around train crashes and photograph homeless war veterans; intrigue walking hand-in-hand with disaster."

I like how you word things. And your summary's really good. ;D Guess I'll be off to chapter two, then. XD
channingcaughtfire chapter 3 . 12/25/2008
Thank you for writing this. I'm not really good at articulating myself, I tend to stumble over phrasing and not make much sense, so. Thanks.
Written chapter 3 . 11/13/2008
long time no see! congrats on the TiRO awards :) hope you do well.

[Oh, the hard-to-get route. Targeting a completely irrelevant area of your life, luring you in like a snake to its prey, and then bam! Snake eats mouse, teacher eats student.]

this has happened to me! haha. ew.

[“ – Of obituaries,” you press on, determined to make a mark on this conversation.]

lovely. this conversation is gold. love the little allusions to whatever she pulled at the memorial.

as always, I'm enjoying it! I hope you write more soon? sorry for arriving so late to the party :)
ByYourSide chapter 1 . 11/5/2008
This opening is so haunting... I found myself rereading it, first a bit skeptical of the second person POV, but it was beautifully written and struck a cord with me. Honestly.
BatsandBows chapter 3 . 11/3/2008
Marriage proposal accepted! Lol.

And here I thought I was reading too much into this 8)

First paragraph was amazing with Ms Mason's description- "her two cats, Jamie and Arturo," "sleeveless colored shirts." The "sex appeal of a car accident" was my favourite!" Really gives you a good idea what her character is like.

The whole idea of "writing backwards" I find very intriguing, as I know it's a difficult process (goodness knows i've never tried it or intend to), but already it seems to work well. It seems like there's already a storm abrewing. Is it me or is there something you're not telling us about Frankie? ;)

Another few favourites- "you sit back into the cushy chair, at ease, like you were in the beginning."

"odd knot, like a ball of yarn, pitted in your stomach."

“Why condone the lie?”

I found her little "obituary-passionate" speech very amusing and intriguing. Can't wait for the next chapter!

ImaginaryGirlChild chapter 2 . 11/2/2008

Well I have to admit I like this story, even though I normally loathe the whole 'you did this' and 'you did that' thing it seems to work in this story. You're doing a good job I think, so keep it up and I can't wait to hear more.
Monica chapter 2 . 10/13/2008
You endured many skinned knees and broken bones before they decided to nurture your dead-end demeanor and spend your college fund on a new computer.

Haha! good story so far. please keep writing!
Dot Cubed chapter 2 . 10/13/2008
"you were struggling not to set the base on fire out of frustration" -ahaha i love that. because it's totally something i would do, so i feel like this is me, or something. it's so personal, i love it.

"Your birth name was Francesca" -so i have a name now! for some reason i totally thought the main character was a guy, and now i'm kinda disappointed she's not. oh well, i will grow to love you, Frankie.

"In your head, you were a tad ahead of the rest when it came to knowing." -love that. because it's such a kid thing, you know? wow i'm awesomely coherent today.

"bewitching your teachers into give you A’s." -totally me in high school. i miss high school D:

the significance of the snowglobe! oh man, that hurts a bit.

kinda morbid last section there. D:

anyway, i absolutely love this and cannot wait to read more. and i really need to get back to writing a history outline, so ta for now :)
BatsandBows chapter 2 . 10/13/2008
Ack, I'm an idiot. I clicked submit before I finished...

Let me start off by saying how much I love this. Frankie’s character, the second person, I love how blunt and indifferent she is about everything- her father’s death “miscalculations, oversized order of steel, horrible freak accident kind-of-thing,” even her best friends death, and how she has resigned herself to being a nobody just because her family have overshadowed her in almost every aspect of life. Four older sisters, phew! (I love the initials thing too – Are you not going to tell us what Greek goddesses they stand for? Are we supposed to guess? haha)

And already I love the friendship between Gallagher and Frankie, there doesn’t seem to be many words between them but they fit together quite well it appears. The two murders, as well – do I sense a mystery? ;)

Overall, your writing is very good. Some parts seem a little disconnected, and your paragraphs could be phrased a little better. Besides that, you write with a very captivating style – very metaphoric and beautiful imagery – “a beached whale, a ship adrift on the ocean, only less lost and more anchored”

I love it. Please continue!

~ BatsandBows
BatsandBows chapter 1 . 10/13/2008
Hey! You posted it. Was I that "someone who requested it?"

It was short but I hope you write more :)
Anon chapter 1 . 10/13/2008
cool write more
Dot Cubed chapter 1 . 10/13/2008
i'm a sucker for the second person, so this just sucked me in right away. haha, it sucked me in and i'm a sucker! wow, i crack myself up.

anyway, i absolutely love this beginning. i love how he talks about alaska, and then pitches a snowglobe outside the window, and wonder pets, and this poor main character D: i feel for you, buddy. and i don't know why all the stories i'm reading seem to have a best friend dying. haha
Written chapter 2 . 10/13/2008
(You swore you could see the thoughts seep from him like air escaping a balloon.)

wow. you write amazingly. I'm not sure if thats very eloquent, but you need to deal with my stupidity at giving reviews :) I feel like I have a picture of these people in my mind. wow.

I really, really like it. please post more?
Written chapter 1 . 10/13/2008
wow, this is really beautiful. interestingly, I didn't even notice the second person POV till the very end. I dont know what's wrong with me, but I think that means you did it well.

this is... artistic. but I mean that in a good way.
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