I like your story

Aww. I enjoyed reading this! I love not only Hayden and Sydney, but Alex and Kirsten as well.

Nice one! :D

Other girl?

Hmm.

It's getting interesting.

I'm off to continue reading. :D

I realize this is really really late compared to when you finished the story. you probably don't care much about it anymore or have improved alot as a writer.

The plot was amazing. sometimes i thoroughly HATED hayden and sometimes i LOVED him-which i think is what you went for? I really like your characters and fell in love with em.

i dont really write or read romance much-or at all. I hate sugar coated stuff though, so I'll just come right out and say it. the flow between sentences, paragraphs, and chapters was kind of choppy. Try combining shorter sentences together description and please please please don't change point of view so much. watch our for pronouns/grammar. honestly, i suck at grammar, really i hate it. my grammar is prolly a billion times worse, cause i even talk with slang.

one last thing-the formalities and accents are getting mixed up. average usa kids dont say "i beg you pardon" but "oops" or "my bad" or "sorry" and add in a touch of slang when theyre talking to eachother. also, combine stuff like "i am" to "i'm" in dialogue.

i know i know alot of critizing. i havent exactly got to checking if you have any new stuff out, but i will. ]

have funn!

-Anri

Finally, I finished it! haha. Well, I was lurking and checking out some stories and I came across this. It's a really cute and good story. I liked it very much.

Funny thing is when I was reading the first chapter, what popped in my mind was that "Filipino author nito." Then I checked your profile. Lo and behold, Filipino nga! haha. I don't know how I figured it out. I can't explain it in detail but I just knew in your writing style that you're a Filipino.

Well, other than that, I really liked your story. As I said before, it's cute and I'm a sucker for Romance stories. :]

Keep up the good work!

~erinn.

Ha, ha, ha, okay funny story. I was reading the part when Hayden's like "the engagements off!" So i was thinking "YAY!"

But then I read that he was in a plane accident and I was thinking "NO!""

No! Stupid Veronica.

Anyways, good chapter. :D

God's Peace,

!Hannah!

this was a really good story. the setting seems current day but the writing is extremely formal, so i'm a bit confused about the setting. also it seems like you're trying too hard to be formal and as a result a lot of the sentences are akwardly stated. but it was really good.

Hey you may remember me I'm the one who threatened that you had better have a good epilogue a while ago. I'd just like to say that the epilogue rocked! Awesome job on the whole story.

WOW...woho...a delightful way to end the romantic story of mr. && mrs. haughty h... bravo to you my amiga...good job from start to finish... nice! nice! nice! :)) for sure, you'll make another beautiful lurve story her, && i'm looking forward for my next craze... :D

I'm sorry but your grammar makes this story very hard to read. Sometimes it looks like you are writing in past tense but it changes in the middle of the sentence into present tense. This makes it confusing and difficult to understand whether the story is set in the past or in the present. However, through the story this has improved, the first chapter was unbearable to read. I didn't read the whole story just half of the first chapter and then I stopped as I couldn't carry on. I skipped to the last chapter to see if your grammar had changed and it has (to the better).

Apart from that, finishing writing a story is hard work and I congratulate you that you had the determination and patience to finish. Well Done!

Nice story, but your dialogue's really rough and unrealistic. The kids can't be that sophisticated. Work on that a little, maybe? Otherwise, good job.

Haha, "smirked with a scowl" doesnt make the most sense there buddy XD. You either smirk or you scowl- one is cocky, the other angry or moody.

It's great, really it is. This whole story has been a wonderful read for me. Do what feels right for the next installment- I suggest to write it and see if it sounds more like an epilogue or a chapter.

O MY GOSH! thats horrible! Sydney is going to be devasted and poor hayden. this kinda reminds me of a soap opera and someone ends up in a coma. hahah sorry. anywayz i love the story so far! plz write more!

No the story is to good. I don't want it to end. But if you do write an epilogue it better kick-butt it's so good. ( Take this review as an indirect complement about your writing.)