|Reviews for Step Outside|
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 26 . 10/20/2011
She should tell him how she feels, it's what I usually do. Even when I've been turned down or had my feelings played with, it was better than those few times when I decided to keep my pie-hole shut. I've heard a few songs by Tracy Chapman that I've liked, none that I can name right now because I'm listening to "At Last" and this song just transports me to faraway places. I also like the Parachute song, can't remember when I first heard it but the lyrics were just so damn familiar, then the title and band name and I had my Eureka moment. _
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 19 . 10/20/2011
Shelly, as a character, really feels like a Mary Sue. Everything about how she handles all the obstacles in her life-romantic, family, body issues etc.,-is just too perfect. She lacks the normal shortcomings of the everyday person. No one is good at everything, no one is liked by everyone, no one is complimented by everyone, no one is so humble without having first been knocked off their "holier than thou" horse, you know what I mean? Also, there is no antagonist to her protagonist.
Hope this helps.
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 15 . 10/10/2011
Shelly's crush on Matt is painfully obvious, I think he knows-although you would have to be lacking all five senses to miss it. Then again boys of all ages have been known for their senselessness.
/When I looked up I saw that Matt had lit three of them before I had lit the second one./ This isn’t Matt’s first rodeo, “kid.” Okay, seriously, can I be the only one who finds that nickname weird and a bit patronizing? I mean, Matt is dating Christine who is in college but he is Jake’s best friend presumably making him younger than Christine yet still older than Shelly. Who is he, basically, to call her a kid when he is hardly older than she is?
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 12 . 10/9/2011
They are way cooler than Jake and most his friends ombined.
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 11 . 10/9/2011
Because I have lost friends this exact way, I believe Shelly isn't making enough of an effort. In addition, she seems to be jealous because Ashley is going places with her new found confidence. I say this because Ashley's growing confidence has succeeded to make Shelly more insecure-which does not happen when you're proud of someone. As for her "losing" her best friend: that happens when you say no every time they ask you to hang out. I've done this, too, and I realize now that I have no one but myself to blame for those wayside friendships.
I hope Shelly gets herself together. _
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 9 . 10/8/2011
I believe Travis is not the all-around good guy that Shelly wants to believe he is. He seems like something of a player. I mean, all the great loves of my life have all had unique pet-names. No shortening their name for this girl, especially to that of a nickname I'd once given a friend. I don't know why but that bothered me. Shelly should definitely move on from him, he is just a guy she has a crush on. She is gonna get crushed if she doesn't wise up, I think.
Instead of "telling" us how incredibly insecure-though she's working on it-Shelly is, you could "show" us. I know I would find it more fulfilling. Because, sometimes, when you add the word "insecure" I start to feel like I'm being beaten over the head with a message I've already received, loud and clear. I hope that helps with your writing in the future. _
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 8 . 10/8/2011
Matt's intentions are: to have a bit of keeping-it-in-the-family fun. Could make things interesting and I have a feeling he likes interesting.
When will Cody and Shelly go out? I have a feeling this Aiza character is no more than a filler for Shelly, you know, until she comes to her senses about how awesome Cody is-for her.
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 7 . 10/6/2011
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 3 . 10/4/2011
Either Cody is a really good friend, a sacrificial lamb (liking her enough to set her up with anther guy), or he's the gay matchmaker. I can see very few alternatives to Cody's role in this whole thing. Personally, I'm hoping Cody's gay and he gets a smoking-hot guy to make out with in all upcoming scenes of his.
90210's Teddy has gotten me back into my boy-loves-boy addiction.
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 2 . 10/1/2011
Jake is still an idiot and one of the worst older brothers I've ever read about, barring the physically and sexually abusive of course. Who leaves their younger sibling stranded in the house while their parents go at it, especially when one of said parents happens to be abusive? Plus, his teasing and allowing said friends to tease is not "tough love" it's verbal abuse.
I don't remember Shelly interacting with Christine in this chapter. Therefore I still like her.
Matt is...okay, I guess. He rides a motorcycle, a fact I cannot believe Shelly missed. Only an idiot would lug around a motorcycle helmet without having one on which to ride.
Was Shelly being sarcastic with all those mentions of that sparkling, possessive, ugly vampire wimp? Because I'm really hoping she was. I hate those books so much. _ I imagine new ways I could murder that entire cast of characters anytime someone brings them up in conversation, that's how serious it is.
| Lucid Lune in Acoustic chapter 1 . 10/1/2011
Oh, the lives of teenage girls. There are nothing but crushes apparently. _
| LanternLight13 chapter 29 . 6/19/2011
While this isn't my usual story type, the way you have set up the development of the character was awesome. Plus it wasn't the usual happy ending, you made it your own. Thanks for sharing.
| squillink93 chapter 26 . 4/20/2011
I LOVE PARACHUTE! Such a good chapter with an excellent song choice! Great story :)
| XtremeAngell chapter 29 . 3/15/2011
This was such a beautiful story! I loved it!
I just love the realisme in this story
All of your characters were great even the bully Francis ;)
I loved shelly, she was such a great girl! I wish I was just as couragiaous as her and I don't even have as low self-esteem as her (I should be ashamed of myself! hehe) I felt every emotion she went through; Brownies for you, for wriing her emotions so well!
Matt of course was another one of my favorits! He was perfect; I kept looking for some kind of fault in him.
Thanks for the story I enjoyed it! I will be moving on to sequel now ;)
| Karenn chapter 27 . 12/18/2010
I seriously cried after reading this ._. Matt is so perfect for Shelly . Usually if I'm reading a story And there's a guy that the main character likes , I would stick to him . But this time ... When I read this story .. I totally forgot about Travis . It's like .. Idk . The bond between Matt and shelly is just amazing . The way you write it .. It was just a masterpiece . I love you man ! :D