OMG!
I love your story, especially the twist in the end, well done!
Keep up the work in the future. I really like the way you write. Thanks again for a great story!

I beg for you to do a part three. It feels unfinished. He's forgiven her and she him, but it doesn't feel like she's over him or knows that he's forgiven her. AHH! I NEED A PART THREE!

You did a great job on this story. You're writing is excellent and the characters were believable. The plot was unique - definitely not another typical reporter story. I was sad to see their relationship end, but I'm glad they got closure. Well done!

oh i hate you for doing that to them ! i love their relationship, it was so sweet and loving ! why D':

why would you end a story like this? i don't understand! you spend like 76794958 chapters about how they fall in love and then you end the story like THIS! worst story...

"Wow, Ben. I feel like Mr. Darcy's housekeeper should be walking out to greet me any second."-best line ever. Love how you describe them together, all fluffy and awesome. Ben sure has a way with lines. Only question...when did she have time to get him a gift if she had none at the party and then they went straight to his place after and ya know...no time or money to get it...right. Maybe I missed something. Still loving it.

Love the romantic tension and the sneaky-ness and the fact that someone might knwo thier little secret. Oh the intrigue. Haha. Again, you have really strong dialogue. Just watch Nat at the begining, it could be the dress, but she sounded a little stuck up and pretentious, again it is words on the page so maybe I am just imagining her voice wrong. Watch your dialogue punctuation as well. Sometimes you mix character reactions in with another's dialogue and makes it easy to mix up who says the next statement. Onward I go...And to think there is a sequel too. I have a night of reading ahead of me (when I probably should be writing haha)

I like all the girl talk in there, it kind of waters down a sometimes cliche "make-over" scene. I like Natalie's battling mind as well. Makes the whole thing more realistic and helps us get to know her as a character. Great dialogue. Just watch for sometimes long, wordy, clunky, sentences. Try reading some out loud and see if you get winded, or could break them down some.

Hi it's me, sorry for such a long wait in between revievws. I have a whole list of things to catch up on and not enough time to do it.

The development of the plot seems almost effortless (though I'm sure lots of effort went into it). I love how all the characters interact and I can picture exactly how everything is going down. You have adorable moments with Nat and Ben and still include realistic tension like Lara. Keeps me wanting to know more.

From a slightly more critical standpoint: "I brought you some coffee, Belle." Dawson came from around the corner, holding two plastic cups of Starbucks coffee. "The good stuff this time." I jumped up at the voice and turned to see Dawson standing behind me.

You have a few descriptions like the one above. It is repetative. Try reading it out loud. If she knew (as she is the narrator) Dawson was coming around the corner she wouldn't jump and mentioning him standing behind her is repetative and un needed.

Also, I'm pretty sure it is huh not hu, as you use the word here and there, but I could be wrong.

Otherwise this is fabulous personified.

Wow, lots revealed here. Every scene rolled together like a movie. :)

This was a sound chapter, you established more emotions between the two and they had a semi-serious conversation. Dumb cell phone.

Sorry it took me so long to come back to this one. I've been meaning to for awhile now. But enough excuses from me.

-Favorite Line: I continued my life as I knew it, save for the few extra…perks. Perks named Benjamin Hurst.

I love how this isn't hard to fall back into. I didn't skim the older chapters, but was able to pick up right where I left off, still connected with the characters. That's awesome and hard to achieve.

A few wording issues in there, where dialogue sounds more formal than people would speak, or you could clarify things a little better but all in all awesome job.

I love the two of them together. With their dinner eating scene/intimate sighing and loving eachothers touch I could have used some more description. I was like, so he made food, when the heck did it come into play (perhaps I was distracted by Ben's hotness?) If I knew they were in a kitchen or leaning against a table or counter or something, or sitting I dunno. Make sense? Also was surprise Ben just sat there silent, and didn't freak when Christan made his surprise appearance.

It's every lovely daydream and romantic comedy scene rolled into one. Aw...wonder what work has to say.

Crazy animals. Not going to lie, some of the dialogue and interaction in this part was a little forced, seemed almost unnatural. But it is still drawing me in and I'm definatley going to keep reading.

I like their chance encounters, not as predictible as one might think and the nice flash of time that keeps things moving...does this mean she didn't go get coffee with him, or is this before that could happen? I was a little confused about that. Once again try reading your, dialogue this time, out loud. Sometimes you use wonderful descriptive words but like pallid...but I don't know many people outside of a Jane Austen book that would use such "High" words. If that makes sense at all. They only sneak in every once and awhile. Off to read more.