Reviews for The Inexplicable State of Being There
Du chapter 21 . 1/28/2016
Why didn't I find this story when it was first posted? My teenage self would have loved it. I was a Dashboard Confessional kinda girl, totallyin love with Andrew McMahon too - I kept replaying anything Jack's Mannequin but also some of Something Corporate's beautiful stuff like 'Konstantine'. This was all so totally relatable to my teen years! My best friends, one of them was in love with Pete Wentz and the other had this humongous obsession with RyDen (Ryan Ross / Brendon Urie). I preferred Spencer Smith myself...
Anyway. I had lots of fun reading this. At times I hated it, though, so elaborating on your question on this uber last AN (though I don't know if you'll be rewriting this anyway...), at times it seemed a bit racist, I think? I don't know how to describe it, it was just a general feeling I got, especially the first half of the story. I'm glad in the end you turned Nicholas into being Mexican, because I'm Spanish and his slang was way off to be Spanish. I didn't appreciate it much, even if it was Mexican. The word "puta" holds such a chauvinistic feel, its only equivalent in English would be "whore". "Slut" we tend to say "zorra" if you're really straight-forward, but overall people don't use either of them.
But anyway. Enough with the criticism. I really, really did enjoy this story. Just like Brody's "Inexplicable", the whole story held so much emotion. It was gripping from the start, I couldn't stop reading. I love how they both got to explore other relationships, and the Brody-Leesh action didn't happen until the last chapters. You madr everything flow at a perfect pace. And to think you wrote this when you were just fifteen blows my mind.
Thank you for this story :) Sorry for the negative criticism, overall the story was so good that a couple words in macho Spanish weren't enough to drive me away... I will reread this in the future, I'm sure.
Best wishes! xxx
Ghost Heart 123 chapter 21 . 10/28/2015
I think you should rewrite just simply because they are like the cutest couple and I want to watch there lives unfold again. Pretend that didn't sound all you know fangirlish.
ScribingSarah chapter 3 . 10/17/2015
This is beautiful.
ScribingSarah chapter 2 . 10/17/2015
It's sad that you're ashamed of this story, because I think that it's beautiful.
Guest chapter 1 . 7/17/2015
Reminds me of Flipped. Im liking this story so far.
sallusocialites chapter 21 . 6/21/2015
You wrote this when you were FIFTEEN? That's amazing. I love the uncertainty of what would happen being there throughout the story. It was never predictable.
amama123 chapter 1 . 6/2/2015
Also I would 100% read a story, even a oneshot, about Nick and Micki :)
amama123 chapter 21 . 6/2/2015
Loved this story so so so much! Definitely one of my all time favourites :)
One teeny thing I'd say if you were rewriting it maybe cut down on how often you use 'slut' and 'fag', I dunno it just made me a bit uncomfortable?
That being said, fab fab fab story!
bubublacz chapter 20 . 1/5/2015
Oooohhh ggooossshh! I love this fluff story. :D I feel so light and thought I would have loved a separate epilogue wondering if they'll end up together married and with children, I guess you just left it right. Because as what you've said, the 'here' thing. This is really beautiful :D Thank you for writing this, I thoroughly enjoyed it! :D
bubublacz chapter 19 . 1/5/2015
Oh lol! And I'm one of those people who did want them to do it :3
bubublacz chapter 18 . 1/5/2015
*gasp* been waiting for this :D
bubublacz chapter 16 . 1/5/2015
I really liked your transitions. I'm having a good time reading how their feelings changed :D It's really good!
bubublacz chapter 13 . 1/5/2015
I usually don't give my comments at the last chapter, but I've just got to say that I love the Sam character. :D
PenMasterEm chapter 21 . 12/29/2014
Hi there. I've seen this story pop up in other favorites and after reading the story, I have to say that it's really incredible. I loved it very much and I can honestly say that it's one of the best works I've read on this website. I thought this was perfect dispite the cheesy epilogue. It was beautiful and I loved the emphasis on art and simplicity.
SunnySideUp26 chapter 21 . 12/29/2014
I would totally read a rewrite (although I thought it was pretty great to begin with).
I loved Heather's and Christian's (I think that's his name but sorry if I'm mistaken) relationship, so I'd love it if you kept that the same - especially the part when Heather reveals that they kissed. It's been a while since I read it, so I don't really remember every detail, so I don't really have any other suggestions. But I will definitely read and enjoy an updated version.
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