|Reviews for On Hiatus|
| amerita chapter 1 . 10/28/2010
I don't really understand why you needed to delete this entire story, the first version AND the second version that you were trying to rewrite. You say it was a growing experience, then why did you remove everything? Doesn't the fact that a lot of people LOVED this story inspire you or at least give you hope that maybe this story is something good, even if you yourself think it was nothing special?
I'm not trying to be rude, I just think this story was really good. You have over 500 reviews and you had me coming back to this website just to read your story and to see if you added anything back.
It was a good run, and even if you weren't finished with it, you could have kept it up because I'm sure there are more people who are looking for something great like this to stumble upon.
Maybe you have deeper reasons for removing it... but I still think you should reconsider putting up the older version, or maybe taking another shot at finishing up the rewriting process.
Like I said, this is just a suggestion! No big deal or anything, I know it's just a story... but it was REALLY damn good.
| aby pwn u chapter 2 . 6/29/2010
Yah, I can kind of feel it too.I think it' her personality. there were many things left unsaid,and her personality is closed and not descrived much :S but I love it and you should be able to tell I have no idea wht im tlking abt :P~Aby
| amerita chapter 2 . 6/16/2010
I just... don't know what to say...
I came back on here looking for the story with the 20 (or 30?) something chapters and it was gone!
But I am glad you're rewriting it. I know how you might have felt looking back at it and at least you had the courage to retry it. For me, I deleted my old stories because it felt almost embarrassing...
Hopefully you continue, I'd love to read how else you change it up :)
| cookiewolf chapter 1 . 4/13/2010
I Wonder whats going to happen hehe
| readaholicxxx chapter 2 . 3/23/2010
great chapter - really quirky! Can't wait for more!
| A. J. Lewis chapter 2 . 3/22/2010
James' character is very interesting. It's nice that you didn't give away everything about him in the chapter. And the way MC described her view of him was hilarious! Of course, if you hate a guy, you'd say he's ugly no matter how hot he is. But thanks a lot, I used to picture James as an adorable guy and now he's a lizard in my head.
You really captured the mind of a typical girl hating a guy. Honestly, even better than in the old chapters.
All I heard was "MC" and "vagina" and my head whipped around angrily demanding to know the rest within seconds of it being said. - That is genius.
I'd like to read more. By the way, I adore MC. :)
| shoe-aholic chapter 2 . 3/22/2010
yay! you updated! james is funny... is he meant to be ugly or does she just see him that way? (cos the other girls seem to thinks he's hot!) i really like the way you write!
| St. Clair chapter 2 . 3/21/2010
Oh god lol. James is such a douchebag but his actions are hilarious. I love the sentence [ All I heard was "MC" and "vagina" and my head whipped around angrily demanding to know the rest within seconds of it being said. ] and the opening line of the chapter - it kinda captures you. MC is once again, extremely likeable, witty and it's nice being inside her head in first person because she's damn funny. And as for James, it seems persistence has worn off at the end. (bahaha - "It's all Greek to me")
There are loads of great one-liners in this, which is fantastic- I love one-liners. (Especially the one about him being able to string two words together in a sentence)
Bit of a typo: "My turned arrived." should probably be "my turn arrived" (towards the end of the chapter, when Ms. Bins is approaching them)
"It looks like you won't have to move, Miss Venteri, Jamie is already sitting next to you," She said
should probably be:
"It looks like you won't have to move, Miss Venteri, Jamie is already sitting next to you," she said
without the capitalisation of the 'she'.
(But they're minor errors really)
I would say it's a bit of a filler chapter but that's fine- I think it's needed to give the chain of events or the plot a bit of a kickstart. It's short, sweet and leaves you hanging for more. I can't wait for the next instalment! :)
| browneyedcolly chapter 2 . 3/21/2010
can't wait for more!
| inSAMniac chapter 2 . 3/21/2010
I like your character's personality very quirky and it made me smile and laugh. I can't wait to see where you'll take this!
| Jo L. Reese chapter 1 . 3/21/2010
I like this story.
- update again soon.
| A. J. Lewis chapter 1 . 3/11/2010
I have to tell you, this is one of the best stories I've ever read! I was kind of disappointed with you deleted the other chapters. Then again, I liked the changes. It's short, the perfect way to start a story. You don't explain everything at once, which keeps the curiosity up.
Great story :]
Update soon? I hope you do
| GeTLoW chapter 1 . 3/9/2010
Its abt time! lolz
where hav u been for dah past months u got me all worried ya noe!
nice chptr for a new start n may i asked wat happened to the old chptrs?
| UniquePopsicles chapter 1 . 3/8/2010
Tributes make me so happy, insomnia buddy.
This story is ftw! :D
| euroweasley chapter 1 . 3/7/2010
It's back! And the first chapter rewritten didn't disappoint. I wonder what happened to get MC all riled up in the beginning, it's been a while since the old version and I've forgotten...can't wait till the next chap!