Ah, the plot thickens!

I like Yuki and Saki's relationship, although I do wish Yuki would grow more of a spine. I guess that's what his future adventures will do, though.

I'm liking Yuki's personality; he really seems quit edifferent from your typical brash Shonen Jump protagonist. I like how easily he zones out. He seems almost autistic.

I'm liking this so far, so I'll keep on reading.

Man, that last line made chills run down by spine. Well done.

You have a phenomenal sense of pacing. This opening is slower than that of the pilot, but I think it works just as well because you keep the pacing quite slow and low-key throughout, while peaking the writer's interest with the whole imagined lightshow and then the final sentence which really drives home the fantastic nature of the setting.

This is getting interesting; I will be sure to read more!

Wow, you've got a lot of tenacity to keep up this project for so long! For that alone I commend you, and you definitely deserve more reviews.

I think you could stand to use a few more commas, to break up the flow of your sometimes rambly sentences? Like, I'd write this sentence this way:" As the rising moon bathed its warm pale blue light over the field (comma) the victorious champion of the people stood up (comma) pulling his sword free from its bloody corpse that held it like a sheath."

I like the way you begin the story, with a brief scene before the chapter title...it's like a cold open in a TV show. Or anime!

The plot is developing very nicely. You have a good sense of pacing, especially with the unveiling of mysteries. Seriously, in the beginning this came off as more of a horror/thriller than anything, what with the excellent way you melded reality/imagination. The payoff it built up to is quite satisfying as well, and I'm interested in finding out more.

As for the characters, they are rather archetypal as of now, but I'd expect that from a manga/anime and they are very distinct from one another, so that's a plus; I don't mix them up. And I love the powers, too; they're very imaginative, almost surreal. Much more interesting than your run of the mill ki attacks. And Ayumi, I love Ayumi's character. I wasn't warming up to her initially because she just seemed like the typical "girl next door love interest" character, but the sudden change at the end, wow! Now I find her the most fascinating.

I'll definitely keep on following this.

Hi. I'm reading your story again (the first time I started and got a couple of chapters in, but stopped, because I was totally busy), but I gotta say that it's pretty awesome. I was less confused this time around (last time I remember being confused) and i'm definately more hooked on it than before.

However, I did find myself getting a little lost in the pilot chapter around the parts where Yuki was having visions, but I guess that's probably what you were expecting from people when you wrote it. And I do feel a little as if the characters were a introduced rather quickly, which made me have to backtrack a couple of times to remember who was who and whatnot.

Other than that though, this story is pretty good so far. I'm glad to see that you've gone this far into your story (over 100 chapters is pretty impressive) and i'm looking forward to reading more. Expect more reviews from me in the future

~ Rumiko

Ah, a very lengthy chapter, but it gets the hook down and nails the gimmick and premise of the story.

The dream sequence opening was pretty good, at the start, it was pretty vivid and detailed.

I also liked how you didn't explain too much back story. That's something that I like to do. One of my pet peeves that I stick to is "Only explain things as they become necessary." It was a nice touch to mention how Hiroshi was so familiar with Yuki immediately after he made himself known to the audience.

My favorite part of the story is obviously the action.

"This doesn't work like fiction. I'm not going to be revealing my reasons or motives to you. You'll die and then I kill your family. And then anyone that saw anything as well. The dead don't need to understand."

This was good. I like edgy dialogue, specifically from my villains, lol.

Anyway, I won't ramble. I don't see a need to point out too many grammar mistakes, just a few run on sentences that I'm sure will be remedied with a revision and edit after the story is complete.

~NsShadowSerpent

This is AWSOME! Talk about Irony! I loved how the climax quickly rose and the imangry was really vivid.

Hmm the transfer student seems mysterious and seems important to the plot, and an awesome cliff hanger to keep people interested.

If you wish to review me back do so for voyage of Ryukai.

Pretty awesome. Looking forward to reading more. I can't believe you have 95 chapters!

I've only started reading the story, but so far, it's been interesting. I had only finished up to the first chapter, but I'll definitely read the others when I have the time. Till then, I'll give a better review.

The chapter was good enough to hook me though. And Ayumi killing the assassin was unexpected, too.

Looking forward to reading the next chapters. Hope you write more!

Yo, it's me again. Anyway, I like the whole 'field dominance' thing and I'm wondering who else will be able to do something like that. Hmm...I'm not sure if I'm giving the right advice, but the sentences are quite long sometimes and I think a coma here and there would be a good touch to separate ideas better. For example, I saw the line 'He stepped back to gather himself still holding his sword defiantly unwilling to accept defeat' and maybe this could be a possible improvement: 'He stepped back to gather himself, still holding his sword defiantly and unwilling to accept defeat'. I'm not a professional writer or anything so it's your call after all.

I do like the character personalities so far. The daydreaming and sometimes naive boy, the over-protective girl, and another girl who seems just as over-protective. I sense a love triangle approaching :) But for now I will side with Saki haha.

Well I guess that'll do for now. You don't have to pay me back for every single review I give though. Just go at your own pace. After all, I'm reviewing because I wanna help lol.

Oh, by the way, I seem to have forgotten but I think I've lost the idea on how Yuki looks like. Could you tell me his hair color and eye color again lol. I enjoy stories much more if I can imagine the characters completely

Hey there, well first of all your writing style keeps it interesting. There are still many things I don't quite understand but I'm sure I'll be getting them sooner or later. The whole plot twist about Ayumi was a good addition although it's like no one even remembered it. Though I think that's part of the story so I won't say anything else. Anyway, I'll be keeping an eye out for this story, seeing that it really has a good potential. My next review will be in the next few chaps or so since I might flood your rview page if I review for every single chapter until the current one lol.

well since u want reviews i did and its a cool first chap u now well i need to get on reading ur ch2 now but in the mean time plz look up this story i think its on. Armageddon:Last Days of Humanity! plz seend review ur a good righter so id like ur openes

Wow, this was quite a chapter. Really interesting, good luck with this one, Eytha!

This was a great intro, I loved it! You write incredibly well, keeps me interested the entire time.

It's getting better it really does have the proper amount of drama, action and the sense of what's going on with Yuki that hooks readers nicely, so another congrats you have earned from me I might check up once in a while on this fic, probably less when school starts up again, if you'd like to review do so at chapter three of Gobou.