|Reviews for late night shifts|
| Jesse the Storyteller chapter 1 . 12/27/2008
"this is your shadow / in my seven corners / cease to exist" ... I think that if there punctuation here, it would make more sense. As it is, I can't tell what it is that's supposed to cease to exist... or if that line is a sentence by itself for mysterious purposes.
"fall in love with / the dying, homeless, / future home wreckers" - this line is excellent. It's refreshingly original, plus a cute take on the situation.
Clarity in this poem would be nice, too, but I think that might ruin it.
Attack of the review marathon! (link in profile)
| Isca chapter 1 . 12/15/2008
"We are not ourselves." POWERFUL!
| tangerine dreamer chapter 1 . 12/12/2008
this is very interesting. i love the phrase "blue in destruction mode" it just really stands out to me. i'm not entirely sure what this is about but i decided i liked it. nice work!