|Reviews for Reader, you can relate|
| lymli chapter 1 . 2/4/2009
yea, I could relate and I like the last lines.
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 1/10/2009
I like the title, it's so straightforward and really different. Plus, I tend to like pieces that talk to the reader.
"who she's met in the recent"... in the recent is a really awkward phrase...
I love that ending too, basically telling the reader to take your memories as a way to help them remember their own. The piece is good, it's different and as the title suggests very relateable.
| The Hippie Nerd chapter 1 . 12/22/2008
Bringing in the "reader" is such a neat twist for this love poem. I like how you go between talking about her and talking to the reader directly. There is some meta-poetry of sorts which is fascinating ("Reader, if you're still reading...", "You must have wondered" with "you" being the reader, and lines like that). It gives the reader a sense that we're consoling you, patting you on the back and helping you through the pain. What adds to that pain is how elusive and mysterious this female is, as we don't learn anything about her or have any idea where she is.
The stanza about all seeming lost and "the path diverges" works well because we definitely know how it feels, and you portray that hopelessness well. You combine the joy of having someone there to comfort you and the reader doing what they can, with the sorrow of knowing there's nothing the reader can do to make things better. You shift some of that hopelessness over to the reader in that sense. I'm liking that about this poem, how you get the reader involved and share that emotion. There's also a nice buildup of wondering where she is, flowing into you looking for her, climaxing with that powerful one-line stanza "And still she's not there" (with the proper build-up, those simple lines can have so much impact).
Keep on writing and finding different ways to convey emotions, this was an intriguing piece. Take care!
| Moon-Chaser chapter 1 . 12/20/2008
I realy like this, the description in this. Very well written.
Keep it up.
| recycle rhymes chapter 1 . 12/17/2008
it's from an interesting perspective. i really liked the last lines.
| Sabriel Griffin chapter 1 . 12/15/2008
Wow! this poem is so very haunting. Nicely done.
| sugarcone182 chapter 1 . 12/15/2008
its just the pronouns that i dont relate to. your writing is beautiful.