AH! What an ennding. This story would have been good here, but now Im curriuse, what did you have happone in the sequil? Lol exlent read.

Well...That was a stupid ending.

Ok so. Read this, and it's interesting. It flowed well most of the time, and your little world was quite cool, if a little too mysterious most of the time. Just a couple things that I didn't really like:

- um the ending. Not that it was bad, but it was rushed. Like, REALLY rushed. It was quite original, but you needed a MUCH bigger lead up to it. There was a bit of foreshadowing in earlier chapters, but nothing else really. And you didn't actually resolve ANYTHING. Nothing had an end, apart from a few people's lives. I get that you wanted to finish it before the new year, but come on! You could have fleshed it out quite a bit more.

- she literally sleeps with or has a sexual relationship with EVERY character. That's why I don't like your whole 'lesbian'/'bicurious' sidetrack, because it was completely unnecessary to the plotline on the whole and came off more as like 'I'm the author, I'm bi and I'm so inserting my views here'. Sorry. An actual friendship with the girl would have been better, because it would have been different to what she had with everyone else. Hell, you could even big up the lesbian thing, but make someone else in the story be JUST a friend, that she doesn't want to fuck. That would make me sympathise with her more.

Oh and you use the word 'male' FAR too much!

Stuff I did like:

- your action scenes: well written, pacy and focussed.

- your conversations: realistic sounding dialogue, not cluttered.

- the plot (mostly): you kept the momentum going, although you took quite a while to get to the final confrontations, it was pretty good. I would just rather you had spent more time on the actual 'war'.

Anyway, thanks for an interesting read!

Hahahaha, that was disappointing but cynically I love it. No happy ending for you.

Wonderfully captured I suppose, you're a good writer and the fantasy creatures and their characteristics was refreshing.

ohmann! why'd u end it lyk THAT?

Yes actually, it was. O-O. This ending sucked. 0_O

Or was it? o_

Huh, what a terrible ending.-_-

So far I like this story, but the plot is unclear. I can't guess or even tell what's gonna happen next, noteven romantic wise. Is she gonna end up with Eli? Or Terrence? Or maybe even this Gabriel guy, or that kid-vampire Derrek? I can't even guess or even tell what's up with the new girl at Elyria's school. Also, could Elyria be less of a slut/whore. She's also being extremely bitchy... So maybe you could sort out these problems for me. -

That last review was me...That's the last time I use your laptop to read your stories.

I actually got some laughs out of this chapter. I did feel this was a chapter driven to push the plot along. I was kind of confused on why she would randomly try to drowned herself. Yes, I understand that she didn't want to fight anymore, but she did a complete character change here.

I felt this was a good chapter even though I thought it short. I, however, did not like the sex scene. It was too short and didn't have as much detail as others.

wow, that was really amazing. i really like the dark elements and twisted violence in the plot, a really great read after all those cliche romances. i really like the title as well, kind of sums up the all story in a nutshell, and very amusing.

great word, it was a wonderful read and very unexpected ending! feel sorry for Eli though!

You, my dear, are a meany butt. That's right. A meany butt. Haha That was fabulous! The ending kills me, but the entire thing is so...heartbreaking. I really wish it could have had a happy ending, but this fits. You have done a wonderful job writing this, and please don't be offended by the whole meany butt thing. I was teasing. :)

Thats how you end it? Really?