Overall this was a very nice piece. The opening was good - you introduced character and scene without it seeming like a huge introductory summary. The way you portrayed the budding relationship was well done - I especially liked how Nao was in shock after waking up at the hotel with Yuu. That part was very thought provoking because he obviously, from his actions and reactions, had never openly thought about the possibility of being with a man instead of a woman. It made me stop and think “huh, how would I react were I in that situation?”The girls in the office were hilarious with their gossiping - I wonder if they saw the men holding hands or kissing around the elevators. I also enjoyed the different scenes.

My main critique for this is that you get a beta - there weren’t really any glaring grammar or punctuation mistakes, but I do think that a beta could help you polish it up a bit. There were several places where the vocabulary could have been tweaked a bit to make a good line into a great one. Also, I was a bit confused on how old they were supposed to be. At the beginning I assumed that Yuu was an older man based on some things that were said, but then he was called one of the youngest board members, and then he was referred to as “the older man” again. So he seems to be older than Nao, but I really am curious as to exactly how old they both are. The end seems a bit…off to me somehow. I think the last paragraph is almost like a summary rather than showing the story’s progression. Perhaps you could work some of the details, like the fact that he’d met the potential adoptive sons of Yuu’s parents, into a different part in the dialogue so that the ending is freed up a bit.

I quite enjoyed this! *claps*

~Tearlit