|Reviews for Ewigkeit|
| Abbytjie chapter 1 . 7/2/2012
I know I'm a grammar nazi, but in your author's note 'Puppen', 'Ewigkeit', 'Puppe' and 'Garten' should start with capital letters, because in German nouns start with capital letters. But other than that minor fault (that I'm sure bothers absolutely no one except for me), this is really a beautiful poem. The tone is just right and the emotion leaks through. "There's no place called Ewigkeit" is really amazing.
Are you going to post the fiction when you're done writing it? Because it sounds really good.
P.S. Bitte can mean sorry or please, so when you say "there's no reflection I can see… Bitte!" It seems like you're saying "there's no reflection I can see… Sorry!" As if it's your fault, if you know what I'm trying to say, and only when you read the next line do you 'get it'. If you move bitte to the beginning of the next line it will all be cleared up.
P.P.S. Why were the doll's eyes red? Is it to symbolise something or is it just random?
| NearlyPrescient chapter 1 . 9/3/2010
this one was really great.
the german was a really nice touch and really helped to cement the setting and feel.
| Qzie chapter 1 . 1/19/2009
Aw... that was sad. The German words were a nice touch. :) That sounds like a really interesting story. You should put it up! Chat later. -Qzie
| Erlkoenigin chapter 1 . 1/17/2009
gefällt mir gut, schön mystisch.
Mich würden auch die 37 Kapitel interessieren!
| DeAd InCyDe chapter 1 . 1/17/2009
This was beautiful
| Lilja Ruusu chapter 1 . 1/17/2009
"Spread, spread your paper wings
and fly me to the small cloudy sky
we used to know."
I love that line! It was beautiful and descriptive! I think it was really cool that it was in german, too!
| Isca chapter 1 . 1/16/2009
"Only those days were good." Beautiful! This line is very striking! :)
"There’s no a place called Ewigkeit." Wow! What a sorrowful line!