|Reviews for Siren Song|
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 4/8/2009
April Fools Day Review!
In the third line I think it should be lonelier, not more lonely. Also in that line the second part was a great description. I really liked the word rattled, but "till she was full to bursting" sounded really awkward to me. Shouldn't it be her head that's full? Also, maybe "till it was full, almost bursting" or something because full to bursting doesn't make sense to me.
I really liked the piece though. The whole idea behind it is really great and I think the repetition and the format works really well. Nice job!
| Left FP chapter 1 . 3/25/2009
Okay...is this a one-shot where the formatting used is that of a poem's? (Just curious)
Anyway, I would say it was a nice read. From start to finish, you have managed to keep the reader's interest. Oh, by the way - good use of imagery. And now, isn't that what Beatles' is known for? I really liked it.
The Siren unwilling to sing the song, yet she is compelled to. It would be nice if you develop this into a multi-chap. (*SIGH* I know something called RL would intervene...but still)
On the whole, it was worth the read. I liked it. :-)
(*So glad you don't suffer from typos and grammar mistakes like her*)
Well, that is all.
| Galadriel1010 chapter 1 . 1/22/2009
O tragic :(
Melancholy and bootiful
| DontWorryImHere chapter 1 . 1/19/2009
| Carus chapter 1 . 1/19/2009
...as much as I don't want to give you what you want, here I am, reviewing. Damn it.
Anyway... I liked this :) Very well written, m'dear. You can almost feel the anguish that the siren is going through.
'Horrified, as she watched them come.'
...supposed to be a double-whateverthey'recalled? Lawl :P
'Her mouth flew open. A note slipped free.'
I think this was my fave part...great imagery.
I think you should write a poem. Now. XD This has loads of poetic techniques in, you'd be good at it, methinks.