Reviews for The Slave of Heaven Book One
RiosDesire chapter 26 . 5/8/2013
I was enchanted by your writing , the tree, and the creatures. It seemed like such a vibrant beautiful place, yet the people also seemed wrong. I should really login to my account to review lol. I have really been enjoying this story! I find myself thinking about it during the day!
AnnaSikanda chapter 53 . 5/8/2013
I'd really LOVE LOVE LOVE more backstory on Lily's mother! I find her such an interesting character! I liked that you gave more info on her in the first version of Slave of heaven! So I would love to see it in the final re-write!
RiosDesire chapter 15 . 5/7/2013
So exciting! Its 2:30am and I can't stop reading!
RiosDesire chapter 10 . 5/7/2013
I have been immensely enjoying your story so far, I almost want to cry on behalf of Lily cause of everything that's happening to her! I am also finding myself fascinated with the religion and culture they have. Seems similar to Muslim, being suppressive to their women. Anyway, just wanted to say that, and also, I fear that Lily's brother may have an unhealthy interest in her...
Guest chapter 48 . 4/17/2013
I wish you the best of luck on getting your very talented writing published, you deserve it. Thank you for sharing your wonderful imagination with all of us. Regarding your idea of getting rid of the blood hound and making it a lilu, I personally loved the description and the detail behind its creation. I recommend keeping it in the story. However you are the creative writer so I will love the story regardless. Cheers!
Guest chapter 47 . 4/17/2013
Loved loved loved it. Can't wait to get started on the next book!
Guest chapter 42 . 4/17/2013
I loved this chapter although Aislynn and Alec had to suffer like that. You writing is beautiful and enchanting. I can't seem to stop reading. You story is one of the best I have ever read. Keep up the good work!
SomeRandomName chapter 1 . 4/3/2013
This story is amazing! The plot, the intrigue, the drama! The characters were deep and multifaceted, and the plot had just enough turns to keep me from putting it down. Keep writing-you have a true talent!
Guest chapter 52 . 2/12/2013
Is this story complete? Because it seems like it is, but there is no complete status update. Just a heads-up, but it is kind of confusing.
rosieroo chapter 1 . 11/11/2012
Hey there! I'm Rosie from a website called A Drop of Romeo and I'm happy to say that your story has made it into our archive, under the category of 'Supernatural/Fantasy'! Here's your raving review:

Rosie Thinks: The world that RyAnn Leigh has created is extremely imaginative and vivid. It's set in a modern day world, but with the addition of all manner of supernatural beings - light and dark elves, vampires, minotaurs, Nephilim, the list goes on. The Nephilim live in their 'White City', and the structure, traditions and customs found there were so detailed and amazing. The women, from our view, could be seen as oppressed but this is just the Nephilim way in the story.

Her descriptions make her world so vivid, with an almost poetic tone to it. However, it's too direct to be flowery, which is a good thing in my opinion. The narration reflects Lillith's personality extremely well and it was interesting to see her grappling with the difference in beliefs between races. The way that the races interact with each other was great to see as well, with the Nephilim and the vampires having a deep racial hatred for one another. The long histories of each of the races are just fantastic and so very intricate! But oh lord, Lucien! He was built up quite a lot from the start and their first encounters didn't disappoint! He managed to pull off being completely seductive without becoming seedy, forced, or downright corny.

I know quite a few people complained that the beginning was slow, but for me each chapter was enthralling and necessary to set up the world. There were a few small mistakes, with using the wrong word or forgetting the ' n't ' at the end of a word, but it isn't distracting at all, especially when the rest is so well written. Honestly though, towards the end of the story I thought Lilith's character was going backwards, instead of progressing, and her obtuse-ness was almost frustrating. It could just be me though! Despite this, I urge fantasy/supernatural fans to give it a go!
flyei chapter 34 . 8/17/2012
Woah that's the toned down version of Lucien? You have no worries here!

I actually don't really like Lucien but I think that'll change once I read more. He has yet to show any vulnerability or I don't know, something personal, so it's hard to see him as anything but what he appears. I'm glad that you haven't taken the easy way out but instead kept him to character which seems to include recklessness and cruelity/ignorance. It's really hard to see how Lily and Lucien could actually be together but that just makes me want to read more.

Anyway, Lucien is the only thing that has yet to convince me and I wouldn't have started this review with him but your comment at the end of the chapter just surprised me :D I'm going to review later something about everything else, but lets just say it's no wonder why you won the award. This is one of the best free online fictions I've ever stumbled upon :)
Soggiest.v2 chapter 40 . 6/29/2012
This story was such a great read. I found myself telling my friend all about it in the hopes that she too would read it, and then we both would be able to gloat over it.

The universe you created is so very in-depth. I love the different creatures and the wards, the jewellery and clothing of the Nephilim, and the very intriguing and unique personalities of each race. It really allowed me to connect with this world, and most of all, with Lilly.

I actually found myself crying once or twice during, “The Slave of Heaven,” which is an incredible feat. The harsh situations that she often endures really hit a nerve for me, and I couldn’t help but feel for her. When she was betrayed by Aubree and whatnot I couldn’t help but feel intense anger, as throughout the novel you become accustomed with the human gang, and the betrayal really is severe. The emotions that you managed to make me feel were amazing- from delight to sad to anger. Well done.

On the other hand, I actually found myself becoming increasingly frustrated with Lilly. Her constant denial of her wolf side became very overwhelming. I could not help but become annoyed when time and time again, after it was so obviously, after everything, she continued to ignore the wolf. I know that it was just an element of her personality, however, I feel as though if you were to tweak this novel, the constant denial should be addressed. I read this kind of rejection in many stories, and I have to admit that it is a way to avoid the character becoming “cliché.” In the sense that, the character isn’t delighted when discovering that she is “special,” “Wow, I’m a wolf! Awesome, let’s save the world.” I can see why you have done this, but I feel like it did not have to be constantly brought up.

I’m not really sure how I feel about her relationship with Lucien, in many ways it is great, but there were some unsatisfying qualities. Of course I’m thrilled that you did not make them instantly fall in love, but sometimes I feel as if Lily should have been a little more thankful of him. For instance after his actions during the Harvest Moon, which, by the way, was amazing and the most interesting part of the novel, did save her life, and he didn’t rape her. She did lighten up to him, but the dislike was still there after he had done nothing to show that he would betray her, but I suppose it was just so difficult for Lily to become comfortable with him being a vampire. This is just a personal opinion of mine, take it how you will.

Lucien is a great character, a sweetheart in his own way, a gorgeous guy in a band, and a ruthless vampire who sucks blood from willing girls. I can’t help but feel a little disappointed that we didn’t read so much about him because he was such a captivating character. The characters in general really had their own voice, as each one was unique and in-depth. You did an amazing job in making us feel how you wanted us to for each character.

Overall, I loved reading this, and I curse my incredibly fast reading ability, as I finished this in less than two days. I will go on and read the sequel which is up, and hope to see Lilith and Lucien’s relationship develop. Awesome job
Rick Veller chapter 7 . 6/14/2012
You are truly blessed. God has many uses for a mind like yours! Follow your heart and he will steer u in the direction he needs.

Rick
amanda chapter 43 . 10/7/2011
i just have to say that this story is absolutely amazing. seriously, the amount of detail you're able to give astounds me. this is definitely something that should be published!
Dark Cyannis chapter 52 . 9/8/2011
This story is certainly the best story I read in the web. I cant even tell you how much I love it. With good marketing you could earn a lot of money.;) I am so glad that I could read your story and your original idea. Keep writing so good.
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