Reviews for The Slave of Heaven Book One
Strawberriesandcream chapter 5 . 1/28/2009
Okay, so, yes, I am liking it so far. I like Abe. I like the friends more for some reason. I like the ward thing, I thought it was great that it just goes "Human, human, dark elf!" all day long. However, I think there is a lot that you are trying to fit into such a small amount of chapters (like you said). I'm not quite sure how you would go about toning that down, I have issues with that myself... but I feel like its a lot of backstory.

I do like the new way that she meets Lucien, but I think it was rather abrupt. Like, la la la, here I am, drinking beer, la la, HELLO VAMPIRE ROCK STAR. I just got that sort of whiplash feeling from that.

I'll have to keep reading and see what I think about the other chapters. But so far, I like it.
ValerieYoung chapter 19 . 1/28/2009
awesome story. i reli like it. update soon!

~good luck writing!
Strawberriesandcream chapter 3 . 1/27/2009
So, I the rewrite so far... but about chapter two it jumps into the meat-needing kinda fast-ish.
Lily chapter 1 . 1/27/2009
Hey,

I just want you to know that i've stuck with you from the start and have loved every chapter you've written.

Just so I'm not confused, this is where the "finished" (I put that in "" because if you ever get published they will most likely change it a little bit and edit.. etc.) chapters are located. So once you finish rewriting the previous chapters, you'll continue updating here? I haven't had a chance to read these "new" chapters as I'm a little busy. But I'm sure they're even better than the first chapters. (Which I loved!)

Anyway..Please finish rewriting, so we can all read some new stuff. You are an excellent writer, who should definitly get published.
That One Dork Stacey chapter 1 . 1/26/2009
Soo this is just a quick review for the rewrite. I just wanted to say, [ and brag that I was the first to review this one! yay!] that even though I was soo caught up with the original post, I'll suck it up and rweread and re-..review everything in this post soon. [It's like 11:30pm and I'm supposed to be in bed forcing myself to sleep] So I just stopped by to say that I WILL be reading and reviewing so don't go thinking I've gotten mad at the original being on hold and have choosen to neglect Lilith and Lucien because Jesus knows I haven't! :D I'll just be reading tomorrow to make sure I have time to actually give a review with the appropriate response rather than some drawled out message that makes no sense because I'm half asleep :

So0o0o0o.. Tomorrow it is!

-Stace :]

[I promise]
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