Interesting. I like your writing, as it is short and to the point. One does not get easily bored. Being as this is not a story or poem exactly, I think it's silly to address any issue of grammar or tempo beyond the glaringly obvious issues, of which there were none. On a philosophical level, I think the piece is clearly oversimplifying reality and the psychological makeup of males. What jumps out at me is how the narrator, and the general population, tend to become extremely presumptuous after experiencing pain-assuming that they have passed through fire and are automatically wiser for it. Though I cannot say what makes one wise, it is readily apparent to me that those who claim to be so usually are blinding themselves on some level. Regardless, well written. I love the comparison of males and females to flowers and bees-poetic, and so true for some people.

I thought this brought out a lot of raw emotion - which is an author's greatest tool. The use of the word idiot is irking me a little, but other than that I found this piece eloquent. I feel awful that I almost forgot to review such a wonderful composition.

~Cheri/Anna

This. is. perfect.

It is SO me. Everyone keeps calling me a lesbian because I've never had a boyfriend and I'm in the 8th grade.

-.-" It's like, really?

Jesus christ.

I loved this. LOVED it. Keep writing!

-Abby

very emotive piece, i like how you talk of the women as flowers and the men as bees, because in reality many women are treated that way, like discartable things and once the bee is bored with a flower, he hops onto another. Thats how every hurt woman feels when the man she devotes herself to just walks away. Please go on :) Nice work.