|Reviews for buckets under the kitchen skylight|
| tonight we bloom chapter 1 . 8/15/2009
This is too good.
| drops of rain chapter 1 . 7/10/2009
Optimism and realism, huh? Well, I thought this was brilliantly realistic. Well said. :)
| Whispers of the Lost chapter 1 . 6/11/2009
1) Because it's true (there's nothing like a annoying, reoccurring, persistent leak that won't let itself be patched up)
2) Because you manage to take something most people would consider mundane and transform it into something special.
3) Because you do it all with style.
It almost sounds like a song, maybe something you could sing softly to yourself next time you find yourself patching up that leak.
Lovely poem, great work.
| Isca chapter 1 . 6/1/2009
The title is unbelievable.
"Plaster's raining on me in softened chunks." And when the world begins to fall apart, there's always someone there to raise the sky again, and help you regain your balance. Brilliant line-of-thought, madam.
The repetition of 'ding, ding, ding' was very clever-it symbolizes the rhythm of rain, as well as, an idea, an answer, a 'yes, yes, yes.'
"When will you?" But that's the point, I guess, to try-even if you're doomed and all is lost.
| ArekuKawaii chapter 1 . 5/28/2009
Word choice: First off, the title, I liked it. The title spoke to me and I had to read this poem. I like how you played on that. The repetition of patching made me think of all the termoil people go through to fix their lives, relationships, and everything else in this world.
Description/Imagery: Your poem was not full of imagery, however, it did describe an instance, helping me imagine what was not actually going on in the poem. The ding, and clink sound effects were a nice touch to think about what would be happening in the scene.
Form: I like that the first stanza is much bigger then the rest of the poem. The ding in italics was nice to separate the rest of the poem as well. The first part being bigger made me think that the first obstacle to pass is much harder then the rest, because once someone gets their stubborn head around they do get by.
Subject/Enjoyment: I know you said it was about optimism and realism, however, I don't see the optimism in the poem. I guess, keeping at something that seems futile is optimistic. I did however think of how our lives are dragged around in every direction and we have to get passed it someway and some people can keep going on and on to try and fix things.
So, I think I went around in circles in this review. But I really liked it and can't really see anything wrong with it.
| young and the reckless chapter 1 . 3/22/2009
i quite like this a lot. there is definitely a distinctive line between the two, realism and optimism. although, i find that in some cases, that line can grow a bit hazy. i love that you compared it to your skylight! it makes the poem feel a little more real. :)
| Laura Schiller chapter 1 . 3/22/2009
Interesting and unusual image; the bleakness of it suits the idea of giving up and settling into reality. The repetitions also fit in well. I like it when people use their everyday surroundings for poems; leaky ceilings are easier to picture than abstractions.
But why did you put your title between those "&" signs? I think it would look better without them, because when I read it, my mind automatically expected something after the "&" and was disoriented when there was nothing.