|Reviews for Bloodborne|
| Tawny Owl chapter 8 . 6/30/2009
Apologies it’s taken me along while to get to this. I also have a suspicion that I wrote a reply to your pm and then forgot to send it and it’s now vanished on my hard drive somewhere. If you’re still waiting to hear from me let me know and I’ll start again.
Your description of Anica getting lost in the maze of corridors was brilliant. It was almost like your writing sped up and that made us feel her fright. And I read this way too fast the first time because the suspense was electric. Seriously.
The use of moonlight in a lot of the descriptions really added to the atmosphere as well. You made it feel like something tangible.
The one thing I would point out is that the appearance of the key in the house keepers hand was a bitten sudden. The way you described it made it seem like it was in the lock already, and if that was the case why didn’t Anica go in? I think I’m being picky because I couldn’t find anything else to criticise. :)
| DiscoVamires4Evah chapter 8 . 6/29/2009
Love the new chapter! Very creepy and suspenseful. Also liked the "You'll be a good vintage for the Master" line. The housekeeper has become a very adequate antagonist.
| Tawny Owl chapter 7 . 6/10/2009
Oh my god, Elizabeth Bathory is a house keeper. I bet she hates that!
Parts of this chapter really made my skin crawl. I actually found the housekeeper dressing Anica creepier than everything else, partly because of the hunger in Elizabeth’s eyes, but also because the whole being forced to dress like that was sort of symbolic of being trapped. Sorry, that sounds a bit pretentious, but how’s Anica going to fight back and run away wearing a corset?
The master can go f- That was brilliant, and the sarcastic recovery was priceless.
| Tawny Owl chapter 6 . 6/10/2009
Tease! Letting them get so close to escape and then reeling them back in. I loved the description of the master. The image of him unhinging his legs and tottering about made him seem weak, which added to the creepiness of the authorative way he spoke.
And Gavril really seemed to come in to his own in this chapter with the haggling. I always got the impression he was very confident and in control, but it really shone here.
| Tawny Owl chapter 5 . 6/9/2009
“Um...black?” – I liked the humour in this, and I’m enjoying the relationship between Gavril and Annica. “Sounds like a modest guy.” That made me smile too.
Although Gavril seems very much like a grown up and not easily fazed, despite the fact you are piling on the atmosphere. I liked the image of the castle, especially the fire deepening the shadows.
| readaholicxxx chapter 7 . 6/7/2009
oh wat happens next?
| Tawny Owl chapter 4 . 6/3/2009
I think it’s broke a refusal rather than brook it. And I loved the rapid appearance of the woman in grey again. It’s suddenness and the physical contact made it a bit spine chilling.
Perversely I’m enjoying the way you have the dates at the beginning of the chapters as well. It reminds me a little bit of Dracula and gives more of a feeling that we’re progressing inevitably towards something.
| Tawny Owl chapter 3 . 6/2/2009
‘Which actually concerned me more than if everyone had been screaming’. – Loved that line it really added to the creepiness.
I loved the idea of the cocaine in the snow globe? Can that work? Actually I don’t mind either way because it was random and funny, but still made sense.
I also enjoyed the frostiness, and mild humour, of the moment the hotel owner corrected Anica before slamming the door and sliding the bolt. It really increased the atmosphere that the village is barricading itself. And it was a very much ‘stupid foreigner doesn’t know what’s going on’ situation.
I hadn’t expected to get back to the bar so quickly, although I do like the way your chapters are structured because you deal with one thing at a time and always seem to end on a cliff hanger.
| Tawny Owl chapter 2 . 5/27/2009
Yay, we get to meet Gavril. Beard and all. The steaming over coats also really helped to set the scene and let us know where they were.
“I’ll think about it. Those chemicals and the lab equipment weren’t cheap.” – might want to take the chemical reference out. You’ve already said that they weren’t cheap.
I like Anica’s philosophy of if it seems real treat it like it is. Makes sense. Interesting stuff her background as well. Is she actually related to Gavril then, or am I missing something somewhere?
Ok, where did you research speaking Romanian as well? Or is it a talent?
And I haven’t been sick at all – haha. And 'him' sounds like a count in a castle to me. Drug lord or not.
I'm really enjoying the atmosphere of this, very gothic.
| readaholicxxx chapter 6 . 5/21/2009
oh wat ahppens next?
| Tawny Owl chapter 1 . 5/19/2009
I’d better pick an expensive one. Ha.
Enjoyed the tension despite the fact that you don’t tell us exactly what’s going on. It didn’t really matter at this stage. The details really added to the atmosphere as well. I can remember the knot holes in the wood, and the eyes being like pools of oil.
Liked the return of the lighter as well. This felt like a very tight piece of writing. I was sad when it finished.
| The Mournful Archer chapter 5 . 5/5/2009
Wow, that's really good. Update soon! Please? :)
| DiscoVamires4Evah chapter 5 . 5/5/2009
so r galvin and anica gonna du it? coz they seem rele in2 eachother mayb if u rite it gud. but dont b durrty coz thats gross, esp bc they r gud ppl u know? i like the drugz stuff 2, u seme 2 kno alot about it, wut do u do? r u in drugs?
rele cool story!
ps. do u get ur insprashun from twilight? bc ur rele almost as gud as that writer.
| readaholicxxx chapter 5 . 5/5/2009
oh can't wait to find out wat 'he's' like!
| ThexSkyxGray chapter 5 . 5/5/2009
this story is rele cool so far and you wrote it rele well. update soon!