|Reviews for Haven's Demise|
| Agent Spice chapter 29 . 2/17/2014
OMG, I get it! I think I see what they were trying to show her! Ahahaha, and they're sending her back! Woohoo!
| Agent Spice chapter 28 . 2/17/2014
Um, what? I can't believe you just did that? Why would you do that?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
| Harlo chapter 30 . 1/28/2014
So I read this chapter last night. I didn’t write a review for it, I just got up and curled up in bed. After a night’s loss of sleep, I went to work than back home and now I’m sitting here about to give my two cents.
I’m okay with what happened. I’m… so happy- so sad- so overwhelmed- so anxious to know if they ever find each other again.
But dear god was that sad. These last two chapters take a toll on you. And it was so beautifully written. I can't get over those last lines of this... it was so like the first chapter of this story but all of a sudden those words have to different meanings.
To Fall away from life, Chapter 1:
" My hands grasped out, flailing for some hidden hand but nothing grabbed back, nothing held on. The foundation gave way, sliding my car and me off its edge. The rough stone escaped my limbs as my eyes watched my legs fall after me.
My descent felt slow, like a film flowing clip by clip, and I had time to realize the fog was sinking in, falling with me, falling from heaven.”
To Fall back to Life, Chapter 2:
“His form began fading from my grasp and I cried harder as I fought to keep him in my arms. "You're my falling star," he whispered gently into my ear, "you just fell right into our lives, a bright ball of energy and I can never seem to fully catch you…"
"But I love you" he leaned my face up one last time and kissed me softly as the beeping of electrical equipment began to ring in my ears. "And I'll always try to catch you," I opened my eyes as the last image of him faded and I told him one last time also, "I love you too."
My hands reached out but no longer held onto anything and the wind rushed past my ears. My descent felt slow, like a film flowing clip by clip and I had time to realize a fog falling with me…
Falling from heaven."
Okay… I’m going to need to sleep right now. I’m too drained.
| Harlo chapter 29 . 1/28/2014
Wow, how do you think of these things? I love you description of ‘that’ place, wherever it is or what it’s really called. I loved that there is no religion in this… but yet all religions cast a shadow in this. Literally, all of them. Charon suddenly doesn’t feel out of place.
My emotions were too raw reading this chapter, so anything poetic or sad just made me cry again. And when there was that infant…. All I could think of was Hamilton’s lost children. I started crying when Eryn pictured those beings carrying them in.
And HELL YAH- she finally understands the answer, she has finally grasped what she needs to do… and I realized it the moment she did and it was like OMG- Everything, the whole time, has been for a purpose. Everything that she needed was there all along.
I LOVED THAT. Other stories- it’s like “oh, we need to find this rock to discover this weapon, to defeat this problem. And at first- she thinks that. And you as the reader think that. And there are all these chaotic factors that you think link to the story in other ways (Hugin and Mugin ravens) and then… when you finally take a step back and realize those things… GAHHHH.
But… you left it with a problem… a loop hole….
She will need to die again in their place.
I still love you…
But I hate you.
| Harlo chapter 28 . 1/28/2014
HAHAHAHA Crying with anger and laugher.
WHAT. THE. HECK. HAVE. YOU. DONE? No, seriously. I had to stop and try not to cry like ten times at the end of this… and I kept telling myself “No its okay, see its nowhere near the end- this will all be okay!”
But nope, she’s dead. And the way she went… the prayer she could hear from the other side. Oh my god, I just started crying again. *breathes deeply*. And at the end of it, your mind is crying and saying NO NO NO… this can’t be happening? Surely this isn’t happening. But then you read those words….
“But there was last thing I did see in the sky above me.
A raven took flight.”
And all of a sudden, you’re crying too hard to finish the chapter, but when you do manage those last words- they only add fuel to the flame. And those last words are so INNOCENTLY the chapter’s title.
I should have seen that coming.
| Harlo chapter 26 . 1/28/2014
Bleah, well that was creepy. Seriously. But as scary as it was…. Seriously I hate you. Why? Because of the sound of Hamilton’s claws pacing the floor as they read the horrors from that book. This story is one that leaves you with a pit in your stomach from all the suspense. And every time there’s those sweet moment’s with David or the others- you’re suddenly overwhelmed by knowing their fates. *sigh* As each chapter gets closer to the end… I’m becoming more and more nervous….
I fear there are going to be deaths on the horizon….
UGhh. Please don’t do this.
| Harlo chapter 24 . 1/28/2014
Thank you for sending me this story. I decided to submit my reviews on the chapters (although I’m already really far in so sorry I didn’t do any for the previous ones).
Firstly, I like the new name change. Eryn is fun, though honestly- I think Kristine was just as good. But I can work with that. ;P
Secondly, your chapters are really eerie. I love the way you write because it’s different- but it also gives me the goosebumps! I guess a side note to other readers- this has some horror to it as well. But I like that. :)
I guess this review is for everything leading up to this chapter. *breathes in deep*
Well it was awesome to begin with. At first I thought I was going to read a vampire/demon novel or something and so I almost didn’t click on it. But then as I got into it- I was like “Whoa this is good and different”. Thank god there are no vampires or werewolves. But little did I know how different it would suddenly be. When, well, that plot change came around- I suddenly found myself realizing the story I was getting into wouldn’t be as simple and basic as other stories containing demons and a human protagonist. It was sad as the reader when you finally began to understand things. It was nice having such a strong protagonist, because parts of your story dwelled deep in moral values… and at times I didn’t want to read on. And I honestly hope no publisher makes you change those parts of your story. It happens in everyday life, and though one part of this novel especially is hard to stomach- I think it makes the story even more beautiful.
So here I am, towards the end of all things- and I thought “Wow, I’ve been so entranced and committed to this- I need to break away and start some reviews.”
Of course it’s making me impatient writing this because I stopped reading at the edge of a suspenseful moment. So now I’m off!
| Graciexbabie chapter 15 . 1/12/2014
You have got to be kidding me? I practically wasted my time reading up to chapter five only for it to stop there? MAYBE you should let your potential readers know before they start reading this story, as what you have done is very rude and unprofessional.
Now if I could kindly have my two wasted hours back, that would be great. Thanks.
| In Awe chapter 32 . 1/8/2014
WOW. Well, I was not expecting to read the equivalent of two fully size novels in one day. Seriously, I couldn't put this story down. I actually called my work and changed my shift because I wanted to know what happened next. Firstly, where did you learn to write so AWESOMELY? I loved it, seriously. I know there was some grammar errors in here, but considering there's so much to your story, I'm not surprised. And don't worry- I think a a publisher can help you with that. When you get it published, you should let us know. I'm proud to say I was one of the first to read what I know is probably going to be a best selling novel. I have no doubt.
| Nightingales chapter 1 . 1/7/2014
Okay. Where do I begin. I'm drained; I laughed, I cried, I fell in love, and then I manage to get so scared at some points that I needed to turn on the lights. I... I can't manage anything else than Thank You. I can't even begin to describe how much I loved this story. I disagree with other people who say the beginning was slightly slow because of discriptions. You made my spine tighten in the begining. And by chapter six... everyone reader here fell in love. No one can say this story didn't stop them dead in their tracks. I don't know what I expected? A cookie Cutter story between Demon and Human? That was a big FAT NO, and I am ever so greatful for that. I thought I was just clicking on another story... not one I would think about for days on end. I hope you get this published. I KNOW that it will be picked up, your writing style and plot lines are AMAZING and unusual and unique. Please post again when you do, I will personally buy it.
| Lauren Stargazer chapter 32 . 11/26/2013
Wow. I read pretty much this entire story today (except Chapter 1, which I read last night). It probably isn't the best choice I've ever made considering I'm supposed to be filling out last-minute college applications, but I don't completely regret it because this is a fabulous story.
Haven's Demise (well, both books, technically) was a bit difficult for me to get into at first because of your writing style. It was almost too slow and descriptive compared to the things I usually read. There were a handful times where I had to go back and re-read a few paragraphs because I realized I had missed a detail or just didn't understand what was happening. But I kept reading and eventually got used to your writing style.
I thoroughly enjoyed the plot and the characters. Kristine and David's relationship was very well developed, although I'm still really surprised that the most of the story took place in under a week. By the end of the story, you would have thought those two had known each other all their lives. I also appreciated the humor and awkward situations you slipped in. I think the scene in which David chases Kristine to tie her up with rope while she tries to defend herself with a ruler is one of my favorite parts.
I was really into this story by the time I finished it. I actually cried for the last couple chapters because I was so touched and happy. You really did an amazing job of creating a new world and bringing all of your characters to life.
| megs92 chapter 32 . 10/2/2013
So the beginning was slow and I almost didn't finish it, but I am so glad I did. I found myself wanting to skip ahead and find out what happened next. The ending brought me to tears and as a reader that's all you can ask for, a story that completely moves you. Thank you for writing this. It does need some editing though!
| PaintedPicture chapter 32 . 9/17/2013
.goodness. I have never. EVER. been so absorbed in a story, I cried. I laughed. I cried so much. I loved that story so much! I have no real words to describe how I feel... Wow... Just... Wow... The only thing that I have an issue with is the grammar, when you used the word lied, it should have been laid, but most of the time it was present tense, which then would have mean lay. Small things like that. I feel So... Empty now that the story is finished though.
| deadwood chapter 32 . 8/25/2013
I read your novel here in one day. I couldn't put it down. It was really good.
| In Awe chapter 32 . 8/4/2013
Outstanding. Truly- one of the best stories I have ever read. Both on fp, and in bookstores. Nightingales, you have a talent the most authors dream of achieving after a life long of work. Though there were minor editing parts that needed an extra look, this story is so long that they are expected. I can not reiterate to you how much I loved this story.
It was unusual at first to read, because this plotline was a first of its kind. It was not cookie cutter like the other books you read today, and so every time I thought the next scene would be the typical one- you just blew it out of the water. Your main character was so strong and independent, but she was able to relate to all of the other characters. Most stories have a damsel in distress, where you have a girl who will never stand down.
I have never been more scared, more happy, more sad, and more desperate in any other book out there. You didn't sugar coat some horrors that actually happen in real life. And you definitely didn't go easy on the horror factor. But you balanced it with love, happiness, and friendship- that now that is has ended... I feel at a loss.