|Reviews for Degrees of Success|
| dx713 chapter 10 . 1/26/2010
I'd rather have real cookies, but this last chapter was fun enough.
| abbsi chapter 10 . 1/3/2010
Really funny story. I'll agree that the ending could use some work, but overall it's really fun.
Also, I didn't read her as exactly insensitive, just really, really clueless, to the point of tactlessness.
| Mak Hertz chapter 10 . 1/3/2010
1. "Yes, I do wear my watch to sleep." - How weird.
2. Poor Katherine, she's been abandoned.
3. Ah, well at least she has the crazy lady.
4. I think that always seems to happen in real life... you have some very important document on your computer, and then it manages to die in some way or another.
5. I bet the crazy lady would like to help burn her rug.
6. Ah, there she is. I'm glad she came along to help.
7. So the question is... who is this crazy lady, and what's the REAL story behind her. Or was that just a random insertion into the story?
8. "I really really need to visit the crazy lady again to get back in touch with reality." - How funny.
9. Yay. Jacob came back... at least something went right. And I'm sure she can at least recreate some semblance of the same story for some writing contest in the future.
10. I liked the PS. :) A random story, but I still found it enjoyable. I am still curious about the crazy lady, especially since she got more interesting in this chapter. I enjoyed reading things you've written, but now I've got another story to read so I'm going to skip off to do that now. :)
| un chien andalusia chapter 9 . 12/13/2009
just had to say i like katherine's almost tourettes-like spoutings. very amusing story in general. don't know exactly where you're heading with it but the ride is very entertaining.
| Jevanminx chapter 9 . 11/17/2009
The Genesis sections certainly add an interesting element to your story.
| dx713 chapter 9 . 11/16/2009
That Genesis story was quite good.
I like Rin's way. Not sure I'd be able to put her with someone like her in real life, but she sure makes for a fun read.
I've not been as trapped by this as your other story. Don't know if it's the characters being too far from my world, or some of the thinks Rin tries being so weak that it's not even funny... But with the time, Rin's weirdness has grown on me, and now I'm waiting to see how this will end.
| Mak Hertz chapter 9 . 11/8/2009
1. "before finding a decent sized bible under my porn stack." - Kind of an ironic location.
2. Helen is a very interesting character... and I'm not quite sure what to make of her yet. Other than maybe comic relief?
3. I wonder if she could really get published when it's such a controversial topic. It was good, but then I guess we do believe in freedom of speech and whatnot. Would be interesting to see.
4. "The lamp isn’t turned on by it considering the lack of light." - Haha. I found this rather hilarious.
5. I wonder if she'll share her creation with anyone else or if this is something she'll keep super secret until she finds out if she wins or loses? Good chapter. Can't wait to see what happens next.
| Jevanminx chapter 8 . 10/21/2009
I love this story it's pure genius. She might be a bit insensitive but with they way Rin is it doesn't seem out of place.
| Mak Hertz chapter 8 . 10/19/2009
1. “Stop thinking out loud,” he commands and pushes my legs off of his. - Haha. Poor guy. It amazes and amuses me what your main character males put up with from the main character females.
2. "you know how he spreads like bacteria across your psyche." - haha. Nice description there.
3. Haha. They're cute.
4. I'm liking all the analogies and general word play... I mean, you always use them but I just wanted to point out that I really enjoy them.
5. I was definitely thinking the instrument shop guy was creepy at first but you managed to change my mind.
6. "I have a really big crush on you.” - Bahahaha! I think I called that in like the first or second chapter! Yes! Go me!
7. Poor Jen. I imagine I'd be crushed and pretty awkward had this happened to me.
8. I wonder if Rin will ever give a straight answer before the end of the story... though she did do a good job of telling Jen in a straightforward way.
9. Wait, he knows about the Jen thing? Or is that just an 'everyone in the group knows what happens thing?' Or did she/Jen tell him? I'm thinking Jen did maybe when they talked? Hmm... maybe if I read on, I'll figure out something.
10. "it’s better to be paranoid than to be eaten alive by gremlins" - That's probably quite true.
11. That's kind of funny that he used the exact same lines as Jen.
12. It's amazing how things like that happen. You think a character is written one way and then read it later and are almost embarassed that you thought that in the past. But I do find being a young teenager a good reason for that. Either way, it makes for a more interesting main character. And I don't mind. I mean, it's not quite Jaye/Jonathan material, but I can tell it lead up to them. :) So keep the great work coming.
| Mak Hertz chapter 7 . 10/17/2009
1. "like I’ve said before, violence is the answer to everything" - just ask Jaye. :)
2. “Her grandpa.”- Well that's... different. haha
3. "now the party is going to be awkward." - well at least she didn't do it on purpose.
4. "I might be able to turn this party into an orgy." - Seriously? Because I think that would be rather impressive personally.
5. I had a feeling Jacob was the culprit.
6. Her thinking out loud is cute, and funny.
7. "Hmm, I’ve never been that great at drawing." - hahhahahaahaha. I love the randomness of this statement.
8. "Holy shit. That’s pretty damn big." - It made my eyebrows shoot up as well. I was thinking a kiss or a handjob or something like that... not full blown sleeping together. Wow... and they're having it out in front of 3 other people. Impressive.
9. Well I'm glad they got their boy angst out of the way and are moving on to better territory. Though I do feel sorry for Jacob. haha.
10. Oh well... they're leaving I guess Jacob won't be potentially traumatized after all.
11. "This car is becoming unnaturally familiar to me." - I believe it's a sign. :)
12. "Damn inertia." - *snicker*
13. "Not quite a block, but definitely cubular." - I think I like the word cubular, personally. And I think this is a very good way to describer it. And I find it particularly amusing.
14. She's pretty random and I enjoy it.
15. I liked that story. I was waiting on the sock puppet to actually be alive though and for it to be killing people or something extra creepy like that. Or for it to appear in her house and her not have any idea why. Or the dad to be the killer and the son always saw the murders. However, I realize that this is a story in a story (that's already been written), but I still had to share that with you. Kids are always good for making creepy things happen.
16. Good chapter. I'm glad the boys have figured things out. I'm interested to see what Jen is hiding... if there is actually something she's hiding. And I am just going to sit back and wait on Jacob to pan out. :)
| Mak Hertz chapter 6 . 10/4/2009
1. "I’m still a little surprised that I wasn’t attacked by any mutant food scrap monsters" - This reminds me of an epic battle I had with my roommates in college... it involved no one washing the dishes until I finally caved because it was so gross. Needless to say, I found a plate at the bottom literally covered with mold. I named the mold Stanley and kept it on display on our kitchen counter for a day so they could all see how gross they were...
2. I figured that's why she was in a trash bag. I do hope it was one of those big black ones.
3. I think it's highly amusing that over half of the phrases she uses are at least somewhat sexual in nature. And most of them are random too, or at least to me they are.
4. Well that's interesting because I was imagining the crazy lady as like an old crazy lady... a shriveled old lady... very interesting.
5. "The trick to a comfortable outfit is all in the , here’s my favorite bra." - Left out a word? I'm sure we can fill in the blank, though.
6. "I think your analogy got jacked up," - I sure hope so because I certainly got confused.
7. So she really was bad at remembering her age in the last chapter. 92, 19... but she's 26. That makes a lot more sense. :)
8. I was wondering what the reaction would be to their display. And I was right. Poor fun people. :)
9. "Hell, unless I’m on crack, and I’m not because I still have nose cartilage" - *snicker*
10. "only less mothers and their leech-like babies" - Hilarious. Never heard anyone refer to a baby as a leech. Very refreshing.
11. "Jacob is as weird as an emu" - Well then he must be just about as weird as the crazy lady. Because emus are WEIRD.
12. "Jacob is as odd as a prime number." - I really like that one, probably more than the emu... but to shoot down her analogy, there is an even prime number. Unless she's not implying that kind of odd. Which I suppose she's not, even though that is what I originally thought... a play on words.
13. Housezilla. I like it.
14. "It has to hurt like taking it from behind with no lube, but he is as enthralled by the building as a teenage boy is by seeing porn for the first time." - HAHAHAHA... oh my.
15. hahaha. I can't believe she used that method with Jacob. haha.
16. Very interesting development. I really think I'm going to need to see what happens next before I can form an opinion. However I will say I enjoy seeing Jacob and I still enjoy the randomness that is Katherine. I wonder if he'll pick up one of her many nicknames. Great chapter! I can't wait to see what happens next! So I can try and figure these guys out a little better.
| Mak Hertz chapter 5 . 10/4/2009
1. Haha. I enjoy the hunter banter. :)
2. She really does remind me of Jaye... kinda but maybe a little of Casey too. Like a combo of them and yet not quite either one of them.
3. "Nope I just made up numbers to satisfy your time obsession." - Haha. I was getting worried when he knew it to the date, but now I just find him amusing.
4. haha... I can only imagine her being a waitress...
5. Kurt... I've never read a story where that character wasn't a punk or bully of some sort. But then, I've also never read one where it was a cat's name either. :)
6. Poor bunny. Definitely an interesting idea, though.
7. It makes a lot more sense how she times the silences when you mention her watch. I'd been curious about that... it was a mystery to me since she didn't seem good at mental math.
8. "I hope it isn’t imaginary people, but then again that might be amusing." - Indeed, it might be, but at the same time, I think it'd disturb me a bit if I were in the same room as that person. What if the imaginary people told him to kill me or something? :)
9. I think I like the crazy lady from down the hall.
10. "The thought of you doing manual labor is a little scary, so don’t worry about it." - That's a very true statement.
11. "Tongues are amusing because they are so pink and weird looking." - I think that's a pretty good description.
12. "Hell yeah, I’ll do anything you want me to" - *snicker* I wonder if that comment would make him uncomfortable. I'm still trying to gauge how like Jonathan he is. Obviously not too much, but I'm wondering if maybe at the core he is. I do see some tendencies, but I just don't know yet.
13. "but I’ve gotten more used to my exaggerations than actual measurements." - I'm probably the same. It drives people around me crazy.
14. hehe. Crazy lady! I like her and her randomness.
15. Well it's still enjoyable to read. And I really can't figure out Jacob. I wonder, though, do you enjoy 'J' named males? But then, I guess you have other named males as well. I am just curious as I had an obsession with male main characters whose names started with a 'J' for a while. Very entertaining chapter. And since you've already posted the next one... I'm going to go and read it. :)
| Mak Hertz chapter 4 . 8/25/2009
1. Haha. I enjoyed their morning banter.
2. Nice jokes. I particularly like the last two. :)
3. "I didn’t actually pee my pants but I was close." - Oh my.
4. "This is between Brian and I" - oh. Maybe Jaye can come over and be their matchmaker... OR maybe Jonathan can help... he's pretty good at it himself.
5. "I’ll admit that the table is pretty, and it has distracted me on a number of occasions" - *snicker*
6. "Not knowing the situation makes it hard for me to sound properly dramatic." - haha.
7. “Now you know why I have yet to write anything I like,” - Aw.
8. "I’d moo to get the idea across but something tells me that he wouldn’t appreciate it." - Haha... I imagine not. These boys sure are angsty.
9. This crazy lady is... random... but amusing at the same time. I am not sure what to make of her.
10. "I probably don’t want to know what a person like her will do with a cucumber." - I may just have a perverted mind, but oh my...
11. Jacob... what the heck is he doing there?
12. This seems like a pretty random chapter, but I'm entertained and amused and enjoying it... so that's all that matters to me. :) Keep up the great work. I'm very interested to see where this is going... as I really haven't figured it out yet. :) I'll just have to wait and see I suppose.
| Mak Hertz chapter 3 . 8/19/2009
1. "You’re never going to actually stop thinking out loud are you" - Do you think out loud as well. This is like the second character you have that does that. :) Just curious.
2. Haha. I like that she thinks it and then says it out loud. The exact same phrase.
3. Aw... I'm sure she'll come up with an amazing story by the end of the story... or maybe she'll start writing a story about a girl named Jaye and a guy named Jonathan... that'd be weird. :)
4. Brilliant! I thought the swerve was going to be because of what she was saying about her and Bria, but then it was because of a drunk driver. I'm glad you didn't just go kill them off right there. :) Now I'm hoping Jacob is the love interest. Maybe it'll end up being some weird triangle thing.
5. "Speaking of foreheads...yup, still Unicorn Girl." - AHAHAHA, I had forgotten about that. Poor girl. :(
6. She's so clutzy, it's cute.
7. "I can throw as much crazy shit as I want into it and as along as some of the words are Latin and scientific sounding, it doesn’t matter." - Haha. Don't tell a Sci-fi writer that.
8. Haha. She is crazy clutzy. :)
9. She has a very interesting thought pattern. I should hope her sheets aren't toxic. Then she'll never get to write her story.
10. Haha... forget to feed the priest in the closet. That's horrible, but funny.
11. “Damn rug! One of these days I’m going to take you out, chop you to pieces and burn the shit out of you!” - Poor Rug. *Snicker*
12. "Well this is pleasant, it turns out that my rapist is Brian." - Haha. Well there was that one time... maybe he wants more this time. :)
13. "Regardless of anyone’s sexuality, breasts feel like mothers, like home," - Haha. I guess so, but it still made me laugh/smile.
14. Oh and I wasn't shocked by Brian's revelation... somehow I saw it coming. Oh well, guess no repeats of what almost happened... which amuses me to think about now.
15. "Oh right, the chair." - I knew something like that was coming. *snicker*
16. "They are like...beautiful...fluffy...sheep." - Nice ending. I find her quite amusing. I hope things work out for Matt and Brian. I'm sure they will... surely. Maybe? I know... Jaye can come help them out. She's good at that sort of thing. :) I'm still loving it. Keep up the great work... or I guess keep posting the great work? haha. :)
| Mak Hertz chapter 2 . 7/30/2009
1. "When I open it I’m craving root beer like a menstruating woman craves chocolate." - Ah, but then you have people like me who crave salty things... and we just screw up that saying. However, I do still appreciate it. :)
2. "My friends call me a bit explosive but I think they are on crack" - *snicker* She reminds me a bit of Jaye.
3. “Oh fuck. Pain, pain in the knee. Dear shit on a Sunday this hurts like a bitch!” - Nice wording. It made me smile.
4. I find a lot of Katherine's monologue highly entertaining. And find myself laughing or smiling a LOT.
5. "Does that smug little bastard think he can get away with drinking my root beer and then rubbing it in my face?" - Haha. Brilliant.
6. “Wow you look like shit.”
“Yeah and your mom’s a whore, what’s your point?” I snap. - BAHAHHAHAA. Love it.
7. "Holy shit, this isn’t a bump. It’s a fucking horn!" - Poor Girl.
8. “How can I get my book published if I’m Unicorn Girl?” - I dunno I think that could bring people in.
9. "Brain is close to twelve feet and Matt a good story tall." - She could write a story full of hyperboles. Ah, at least she knows it.
10. "until he tries to stick it in. The drunkards have no sense of aim.” - See a story of made up stories... she'd be good at it, and overly amusing as well.
11. Now I'm particularly confused as to who the love interest is going to be. I'm even getting a vibe from Jen... or at least that she kinda has a thing for Katherine if nothing else. (But then, maybe I'm reading into the "secret talk" too much.
12. I like dusty drabble; it entertains me. Excellent chapter. I really enjoy your writing. Keep up the great work!