Okay this is rather intriguing.

It sounds like they have an arachnid problem...ahem.

The tone and pace was really nice and the family being at the door and not approaching to help her was really funny.

That has happened a couple of times to me.

I think you should do your flashback in italics but that is just a formatting thing so if you don't its no biggie.

I like the fact you use first person but you have to be careful with the use of 'I' too much. Mix the beginning of sentences up a little more to stop the redundance. If it was a longer read it could have dragged your story along. So try to watch out for that.

I am not the great with technical stuff as for as plot the prologue makes me want to see what will happen. The way you ended it was rather clever as well, so we know the spider bite is a blessing in some way. I like the last line of 'Hello darkness'

Over all I think you have something going with this and hopefully I will get to read more.

Momo author of My Queen - Pay it forward the Roadhouse.

rally like it so far. keep writing and i'll be looking forward to it.

I loves it so far! Keep updating and I'll love you forever! : )

Really well written, one can feel the emotions the protagonist is going through - keep it up!

Good job, LOL. c:

awesome. i like all the description.