Reviews for Darkness Becomes Her
Victoria chapter 41 . 8/7/2010
OMG NO. I hope he stops her in time!

Haha. Great chapter! Looking forward to the next one!
scorpio17910 chapter 1 . 7/14/2010
Well, I must say this is definitely an interesting prologue (brownie points for you: prologues are meant to be interesting and draw your reader in). It's been a while since I've read one so well written.

I rather like how you've portrayed Hades's and Demeter's relationship here in the beginning - doubtless, it will change in time, though. I personally think it's very unique. I haven't yet come across a story where they have a mutual respect for one another in the beginning. It's a good shift from the ordinary.

A bit of [hopefully] constructive criticism. There are one or two places in here that are a bit awkwardly phrased. Meaning I had to go back and reread these phrases several times before I understood what you were saying. There aren't many (which is definitely a good thing), but keep an eye out for anything that doesn't seem to flow. Something I do with my own writing (none of which is up on this site as of now) is read it aloud to myself. Often, I am able to catch little things I couldn't while I was simply reading it in my head.

I want to thank you for using vocabulary that some people will need to go to a dictionary for. It's good to know that some of the words I use in everyday language haven't disappeared from the rest of the world!

I really am looking forward to reading and reviewing the rest of this story. Hopefully, what I have to say will encourage you as an author.

-Scorpio
Contemporary.Jane chapter 40 . 7/8/2010
This story is REALLY good, are you going to update soon?
reallyrandomname chapter 40 . 6/21/2010
I just randomly started reading the last sentance I know that is a bad thing but me and my friend are misunderstanding whats happening but you know that happens.
Typhaegia chapter 40 . 6/7/2010
Persephone handled the situation fairly well- I expected her to go on a rampage, but she was mature about it so that's great. However, an apology from Hades wouldn't hurt! But then again, it was suppose to be a sneaky act and it does add drama to the story. This trip to the Lethe should be interesting!
j.c-chic chapter 1 . 6/6/2010
i must say that i'm really happy you have a fp account because i've been following this story worthy of love on aff and its a real killer because i have to check back everyday to see if you've updated :(

but anyway, kinda annoyed that part of seph wants to forgive aidon. like, seriously! castrate that mother- okay let's not get into that lol. but yes, i think another 2 chapters of anger at aidon should do it :)

thanks for finally updating! i can finally r.i.p :)
llashan chapter 40 . 6/6/2010
Hm I love this chapter, you've really worked Persephone's reaction very well - from shock and disbelief, to anger and betrayal, and finally cold seething and calculating. I would have mentioned her trying to spit the seeds out earlier though; I was thinking while reading "Why doesn't she try to throw them up or something? That might have been the first reaction for most people..."

That said, you're also ensured people don't hate Hades for what he's done, by working him up to have a simplistic view, or at least lacks the people skills to be able to understand that THAT'S JUST NOT WHAT YOU DO.

Well done mate, awesome job :)

-llashan
missme chapter 40 . 6/6/2010
A little bit of wonderful. I love your story.
Eva Rieycoit chapter 40 . 6/5/2010
Oh no. I hope she doesn't mean to make herself forget everything...

But great job! I loved this scene. I loved how you managed to balance dialogue and description perfectly well!
Dramaqueen-is-me-14 chapter 39 . 5/28/2010
She's not going to be happy with him. Well at first. Maybe she'll get over it... Loved it! I like to review here and read on AFF because the story just seems to miss something without it
rubyreader chapter 2 . 5/13/2010
love you for this story!
Typhaegia chapter 39 . 5/12/2010
They had such a good time and made such a huge step in their relationship...why did Hades had to screw it up? I hope Persephone puts him in his place!
Souless-Apparition chapter 39 . 5/8/2010
Omg please make her be furious with him! i'll go crazy if i read another story where a woman has let the man dominate and control her. But great story.
Eva Rieycoit chapter 39 . 5/7/2010
Ohh... I think Hades is going to be in for it.
M.Bianca chapter 39 . 5/7/2010
he's toast!
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