Reviews for All Together, All Alone
Cryssean chapter 7 . 10/11/2009
dude is that seriosly the end? im hooked and its over and im still wondering what happens next! in the 5th scene i believe trish is talking to the teacher and it says the teacher touches kims sholder...is that how its suposed to be?PLEASE if there is more post it...
rage of aquarius chapter 7 . 10/7/2009
You're welcome!

Wow, an explosive end. Or perhaps implosive, I'm not sure. "I’m seventeen. I shouldn’t need imaginary friends anymore." Oh, goodness.

And the end-must it be the end, really? Of course, artistic creativity and cliffhangers-as-endings work really well, and I'm a fan myself, but it never quenches the literary hunger, does it?

Simply marvelous.
fictionalboyfriend chapter 7 . 10/6/2009
WHOA.

You have just officially BLOWN UP MAH BRAIN.

This play is AMAZING. Seriously. AMAZING. I want to film it. I want to have it on DVD to watch whenever I think, "Aww, I'm so lame and will never achieve anything", because, honestly, you are SO inspiring and awe-inspiring.

You did a really excellent job of creating tension and setting the tone for this play, and I definitely didn't see that ending coming until it happened. Now I'm kind of sitting here going, "Wow, wow, squee! I'm friends with her! I'm friends with her! Isn't that cool?"

DO ANOTHER ONE. I COMMAND YOU.
fictionalboyfriend chapter 6 . 10/6/2009
NO!

You're far, far too good at setting the mood. This play is so effective for all that it's not very long.
fictionalboyfriend chapter 5 . 10/6/2009
HUGS

Ohh, dear. If I heard one of my friends talking like that I wouldn't be able to sleep for a week. Trish really isn't going to be okay, is she?
rage of aquarius chapter 6 . 10/6/2009
"My mouth coated in this bitter taste."

My soul died of (painful) joy.

Oh, oh, oh...!
rage of aquarius chapter 5 . 10/6/2009
I devoured it, of course, as soon as the author/story alert was delivered to my e-mail.

The mood is amazing. What really gets me is: "I don’t want you to remember me like that." Does that sound ominous, or is it just me?

Beautiful, as always. Keep at it, and keep the confidence to share your work. It's amazing, and so are you. Hope things are looking up.
fictionalboyfriend chapter 4 . 8/5/2009
Wow. I want to see this staged.

Actually, I want to hear this sung. It's got a very RENT feel to it.
rage of aquarius chapter 4 . 8/4/2009
Thanks for the mention!

This just screams awesome to me. So many things to like. "Everything we are, distilled down to numbers."/"The future."/"It's simple." Says everything I've ever felt that's wrong with the world, in just a few sentences. Also... "KIM: (walking forward, frightened expression) Alone..." For some reason, just seeing the presentation of this on the screen...is eerie. Disquieting.

I'm riveted. These are some wise high school kids. I wish kids were that wise when I was in high school. Again, just *so* relatable. Here are all my encouragements and kudos and good-jobs in one big review e-hug!
GaIn chapter 3 . 7/29/2009
Hey, this is pretty good! Most screenplays like this are hard to follow with the format and everything, but this one's easy. I guess it's the characters that really drew me into this. They feel so real.

Can't wait for more. :)
fictionalboyfriend chapter 3 . 6/27/2009
Whoa. You've done this incredibly effectively, letting people know what's going on without telling them outright, letting us feel Trish's pain without hamming up the angst.

Congrats, I hope someday to have that kind of chops.
rage of aquarius chapter 1 . 6/27/2009
"Trish: I feel like ... A technical error." *Love* that. So postmodern.

Kim's monologue on the bus is breathtaking. It goes from such nihilism to a sort of poignant reminiscence with the "guy in a business suit." What better way to get to know someone than to ask: It's the last day before the world ends, how are you going to spend it?

It captures high school perfectly. I think I was all of these girls at some point in my life.
itdependsontheday chapter 2 . 6/18/2009
it's really good so far but I can't figure out where it's going. please post more so i can find out!
fictionalboyfriend chapter 2 . 6/7/2009
Aww, I kinda feel sorry for these characters. Not really, because they're sort of living life on their own terms, but I do feel that maybe they need a little more love. Trish, definitely.

Excellent as usual.
cssndr chapter 1 . 6/7/2009
"I shall post the rest if people express interest in this..."

i express interest; please post the rest!

even though nothing much happened, you managed to establish the fact that Trish/Jazzy/Kim are loners, who are going to be "alone together"! in other words, your introduction is short&sweet. (i like it)

your title is apt (:

looking forward to the rest of your play!

-

anw, thanks for your encouraging review!
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