Reviews for anatomic mockneck
smoke another grin chapter 1 . 3/3/2011
I love the words you throw together to form some kind of moonlit graveyard, bitter with loss, but the punctuation doesn't quite work for me. I've fallen out of love with exclamation marks, they're kind of. I don't know.

and "your devious voice is a croon for: molestation, adoration, excitation" - the line itself was very good, but the colon turned it into a sort of list, and made it lose some of its power. but otherwise, good job! (haha, exclamation mark. P)