|Reviews for Jungle Buddies|
| Eye Decay chapter 1 . 12/25/2011
This was an amazing short story. Didn't really find any faults to it. My only disappointment is that it completely drew me in, and made me want to read more. It seems like such a good storyline. You're a good writer, keep it up.
| J112011 chapter 1 . 12/3/2011
This is intense and very different than what I've read so far. Somehow it feels to me like it's a piece from a larger story (probably because of "the" in "Beyond them, Dick could see a G.I. holding the boy's hand")
Interesting piece about the horrors of war. On the other hand it's kind of sweet how Dick cares about the boy, even though (or maybe because) he killed the boy's mother. If it is a bit from a larger piece, I wouldn't be surprised if PTSD crept up some time later.
| Anthony G. Cirilla chapter 1 . 4/17/2010
An interesting start. A lot of potential for character dynamics. I am not sure, but I don't think 'lieutenant" should be capitalized unless it comes immediately before a person's name. I also don't think you should give a separate line to Dick's dialogue:
Dick tried not to inhale the smoke too deeply. "You think they'll understand?
About the woman, I mean. I didn't mean to do it."
No need to tab down to give it its own line, I don't think. Not a whole lot to review on here, but I think this could develop into something nice.
| wo bu ai ni le chapter 1 . 12/26/2009
I see your point about war making strange companions, but this doesn't seem to go with your usual style. Serious in tone, conforms to the reader's expectations and almost predictable. But disturbing - well done for that.
| bunnypopcorn chapter 1 . 12/8/2009
That's harsh O_O. But very well-written indeed :).
| LYCC chapter 1 . 8/10/2009
I like it. :) Really nice story you've written, but the ending could have been better.
| natmarie chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
Short and simple, with the complex undertones of war. Nicely done. :)
| Lady Livia chapter 1 . 7/22/2009
Is this going to be continued?
...the dead sniper bleeding everywhere gave me images of the skinned guys from the Predator movies.. :)
| accountkiller1231231 chapter 1 . 7/10/2009
This is very short, and usually people are like yelling at me because, I don't put much detail and all that crap, but anyway, I got the idea. I'm sort of confused with these soilders and blah, but that's probably just me not knowing all this Army stuff. Aha.
| East-0f-Eden chapter 1 . 7/8/2009
that's very awe inspiring. however, i think you could make it into a better more detailed story. you just need to add more description. i like the short sentences. you're style reminds me a tiny bit of Catch-22 mixed with SlaughterHouse 13. You just need to be more in depth. Those are great books for inspiration for your story. they're great books period.
| J.A. Fletcher chapter 1 . 7/8/2009
This was an interesting piece. My guess of the war is either Vietnam or Korea.
| LostInMe chapter 1 . 7/5/2009
At last, the long-awaited "Jungle Buddies"! I thought it would be a poem, so it was a nice surprise to find a short story. Anyway, aww! I'm not sure if that's the exact reaction you're going for, but it's so cute! (I just found one mistake - the last sentence is a run-on.)
| Isca chapter 1 . 7/5/2009
The "I killed his mother" line was such a nice plot twist. I also like that Dick asked the officer if they would all 'understand' that it had been an accident. It's crazy to think that the kid takes a candy bar from the man who shot his mother. That's both shocking and profound. Keep up the good work. :)