Hurry and review!

The history lesson was a little far fetched, but I do understand this is fiction.

Hey,

sorry I forget to mention in my other review to watch out for spelling and grammar. I have noticed a few errors (probably just typos). But try and avoid them (lol, that's pretty hard, I know) as it disrupts the flow of your story (which is great by the way!).

Garneau.

Hey there,

Great story. It's such a different spin off the old vampire drama. At the moment there doesn't seem to be that much of a storyline, but I totally realise that you are only five chapters in and you probably are just introducing the characters and situation.

I really like Claire's attitude. She is such a sassy and innocent/awkward chrarcter. I really like her.

As for Griffin, I think your descriptions of him are really really good. (Plus a really unique name!) Having said that, I don't really like his character too much. I think it's becuase I don't know to much about him, and there hasn't been much interaction with Claire and him that reveals his character. I think his 'princess' pet name is really good, but at the moment I think you could really develop his character more. Hopefully his character will become more indepth as more chapters are written?

I think you have created the history and genetic part of the story the best. Such a creative idea of making the 'vampire' a sort of result of evoloution. I thought you explained that extremely well, and made it very interesting and almost plausible. ;)

It is such a different telling of the vampire story, yet absolutely refreshing.

I love how you have already introduced 'competition' in the form of Shane. I can't wait to see what Griffin thinks of all of that.

Can't wait for an update,

Garneau.

i miss griffin. i hope claire accept him. please please update soon

Pshh she totally wanted him there!

Ahaha I love Griffin's confidence!

I would be scared too! But hopefully he can do something that can change her mind about him.

I love this story so far! I can't wait to know sexy man's name hehe.

thanks for the background info!

Well, it was nice to get this update, though, truth be told, I'd forgotten about the story and had to go back and skim the first chapters to figure out what was going on. Maybe more frequent updates would induce more people to read and get excited about the story?

The story is basically well written. The only thing that jumped out at me was the overuse of the word 'store' in the first paragraph. You used it 3 times in one paragraph. Note below how I changed it up, using the word 'establishment' and then naming the store to avoid overuse

It's currently eleven forty-five in the morning on a Tuesday, and I'm moments away from entering my store. I turned towards the sun squinting through my sunglasses. It was unusually bright, and hot, BUT, The hotter it is, the more people meander into air conditioned ESTABLISHMENTS, like my PLACE, THE BOOKNOOK AND COFFEE SHOP. I glanced at the sun one more time smiling, before opening the door.

It is an interesting plot so far and I hope to read more soon.

So being a nosy so-and-so I had a look at your profile after you left me a review and happened to come across this little gem of a fic... I absolutely love the idea! I know it's been a while since you've updated but I'll be waiting eagerly for the next one!

Loved it! Keep it up!

Awesome chapter I can't wait for more!

i love your Story. Its awsome.

& not the same as other stories, so thats a good thing about it(x

Please keep writing itt. A.S.A.P

Thankss.