Reviews for Took My Heart as a Souvenir
Anonymous carmen LOL chapter 1 . 2/19/2010
i like this. maybe it's because i can relate myself to this story. :)
Simon chapter 1 . 1/2/2010
Very good imagery. The lyric was a great addition to the story. I felt as if I was in the story with the female character.
Lisa Kiwi chapter 1 . 8/18/2009
heyheys, u and ur stories angela. so creative; x] well, if this is a prologue, then u better write the next chapter now! xD cuz i wanna read more pls
anonymous chapter 1 . 8/16/2009
Its a rather good story because when I read it, it seems like a prose and a story mixed into one. Its original in that sense. However as a prologue I think this could of been can be written in a regular story format and have the prose/story hybrid used in a interlude scene. My final comment is that for a prologue you should of given some type of background information before you jump right into a pre love scene. Overall it shows potential to be a very good emotional piece.
Valeriee chapter 1 . 8/15/2009
anglea you id such a great job in expressing emotion and describing your surroundings

its like, i was in the story myself. im the character

i really enjoyed reading this chapter

write moree soon.!
Tony chapter 1 . 8/15/2009
o.o wow such romantic words from such a talented writer Angela ... forgot ur last name! well Great work on how to make people think and give them a backround good enough to imagine the scene and situation ! Great job!
Eric a chapter 1 . 8/14/2009
wows! i liked how you described the feelings and such. i enjoyed reading it even though it was sad.
j.f. Lane chapter 1 . 8/11/2009
Interesting structure with the switch between lyrics and narrative, though it did jolt me out of the story on occasion. Is this a work in progress, though? It feels like there's something I'm missing about the relationship and how it ended. I was expecting an explanation that would help me sympathize with the character, but didn't get one. Adding more character development between lyrics and inserting a little backstory could really help the piece. Over all, though, it was enjoyable.
Brown Bengali Man chapter 1 . 7/25/2009
This was, overall, a cute story. It really brought back the feelings of being with someone to me..something I haven't felt in a long time. You have a way with playing with emotions and know what to say and how to say it to spark those feelings in someone. Although I would've appreciated it if you spent more time developing the character rather than just jumping into a relationship thing (or maybe that's because I didn't read the rest of it if there is a rest? ;D). I really felt in touch with the girl and understood her sad happiness.. :]

Congrats Angela~!
kyougurlie57 chapter 1 . 7/25/2009
me gusta! keep going with it!

whose that messed up guy O! hahaha i like how you write! hehe
aimme chapter 1 . 7/19/2009
hehe, i told you i would read it!

wheres chapter 2? LOL.

anyways, it was cutee;]

por gurl ;[

she shud let the memories stay in the past and look towards teh future;D

updatees? ;o
missashleyyyD chapter 1 . 7/17/2009
its been so long that ivee actuallyy read your writings cuzhh yu havent SENDD ANYY of them to me for a LONG time too :D

buhh i liked this onee. i likee the way how youu put the lyriics likee as part of the storyy ! i was listening to the songg while readingg ! i was readingg youre flying away ... & it was singing it too ! LOL that was cute ! i like the wayy youu use thee pretty colors to describe the pretty sky as it sets ;D

its really romantic! & sad too ! buh remmeber that lonee girl in the endd alwayss got someone in the end
iLikeEggs chapter 1 . 7/17/2009
i cried T-T

it's so cute !

& your description are flawless-

i can vividly imagine all of the scenes
mommy loouiseeee chapter 1 . 7/16/2009
[in] the past 3 weeks.

sky like this [take out one].

She [s]miled up at him.

those are the only grammatical errors i saw.

i love it. it has such a unique touch to it, i can't put my finger on it. it seems like the girl in the story really is you because i can feel all the emotions. i reread it and it seems like i can place my shoes in this situation. i can't wait for the next chapter to come out.

props to my loving daughter~