|Reviews for My Last Protagonist|
| Sakina the Fallen Angel chapter 1 . 7/24/2009
This was an intriguing read, in that it wasn't straightforward to follow at all, and all the way through I found myself thinking about what the narrator actually means. At first, it seemed as if the main character was living in her own world, and that's the impression I got until halfway through. The last paragraph cleared things up nicely though!
Spotted an error:
And that left homicide homicide [repeated word] with a pending police investigation.
Sakina from the Roadhouse x
[Please pay it forward to my story, Soul Catcher!]
| Xx-Angel-of-Shadows-xX chapter 1 . 7/24/2009
Wow. That was very...powerful? Is that the word?
At the end, it stuck in my mind for some time afterwards, I don't think I've read a story much like that before.
A few errors however, very small though.
You wrote, "wise in the way people hated inappropriately casual about death." This should be, "wise in the way people hated, inappropriately casual about death." Or of course, you could replace the comma with an "and".
Also, "At least not a satisfactory one, in Julia s mind." Get rid of the space between the "Julia" and the "s", and put an apostrophe in there instead.
Other than that, well done, the story was well written, had a good range of vocabulary, and a very clean finish. Congratulations!
Yours from the Roadhouse,
| melaniekbeatrice chapter 1 . 7/23/2009
This is interesting and perfectly strange and your style is comfortable to read. I like it very much so.