Reviews for FRIENDS
Makkura Mikoto chapter 1 . 12/2/2010
that is a great way of describing friendship, it makes me think of what my friends want.
Erica Jo chapter 1 . 9/1/2009
great imagery
StickIntrinsic chapter 1 . 8/10/2009
Wow this is so simply beautiful. Definitely a great representation of love for a friend in a funk. Keep writing good stuff!
Isca chapter 1 . 8/10/2009
"I thought you were a rose." Not only is the tone of this line very striking, but the comparison between a blooming flower and friendship is quite beautiful and moving.
dragonflydreamer chapter 1 . 8/8/2009
I love the comparison to a rose. The way you describe it, it shows such strength, beauty, and respect towards this friend (maybe even a bit blinded by that respect). It’s definitely a relatable sentiment about the feeling towards close friends.

Also, with the last line, it makes me wonder if this person really is the speaker’s friend, or just someone they admire and want to be close to. The caps seem so forceful, almost like being shouted. I like that twist.

One typo: In the first line, “everytime” should be two words.

Nice piece. It’s refreshing to see a friendship poem that deviates from the cookie-cutters I usually see on this site.

Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)
Lilja Ruusu chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
Very cute! I loved it, and that is the true meaning of friends, always being by their side, always thinking they're beautiful...Ya.

D
fatbird33 chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
i really like the first stanza and the metaphor of the rose and her loosing her petals. but the last few lines didn't really work for me. First i don't know why you capitalized friend. it was kind of like "AH it's attacking me in the face", do you know what i mean. and then the last two lines weren't really poetic which didn't fit with the rest of the poem. if i were you i'd just keep the first stanza and leave it at that, and then decapitalize the title. good start, though.

remember: review marathon:)

fatbird
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
Thanks for your review! Sorry I am so far behind in my alerts! Hope everything is well with you.

"that’s why even now you’ve lost your petals"... "even after" or "even though" or "even now when"

I wouldn't capitalize friend like that. It seems kinda tacky.

I did like the piece though. Your rose metaphor worked really well and the ending was very sweet.

PS If you're bored check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (links in my profile).
Amaury chapter 1 . 8/7/2009
This is so beautiful.

I LOVE this. I'm blown away.

Your use of metaphors is stunning.

That truly is the meaning of a friend.